S59 76ers Press Conference

[K-100]

It is almost over. My stint in tax jail is nearly done. I just need to behave this season and Uncle Sim will open my cell door next May.

I cannot wait.

Last season sucked. We finished 7th in the draft lottery and Quailman comes knocking with a sweet trade-down opportunity by dangling the 2050 Knicks 1st rounder in front of my face so the Sixers slide to #11. And lo and behold, there is a future franchise cornerstone sitting there when we are on the clock. The future savior is none other than Jeff Van Gundy. It is exciting to see such a talented prospect fall right into your lap and we look forward to seeing him develop in the G-League this season.

In other news, I traded Geronimo Rubio De La Rosa to the hated Cavaliers. It is a shame to lose quality talent, but I wish him nothing but the best in Cleveland. I know jlmarines will probably waste his paid training on something dumb like PSD or BLK, but G-Baby deserves some TLC after the hell he went through in Philly. Plus, I can poison-pill him next offseason during RFA and bring him back into the fold. It is a win-win. We have a lot of new faces too this season, including the beast Myke Henry. I have always been a fan of his game and will pretty much let him run the show this season à la Delmar Lopez these past few years.

Lastly, TC has now created a new monster in Philly - Chief Kickingstallionsims

I knew this dude had Glen Sabo Jr. written all over him when I drafted him back in 2045 and am so looking forward to inking him to a long-term deal next offseason. The wait was definitely worth it.

Projected Starting Lineup
PG - Teddy Dizon
SG - Zack Keller
SF - Myke Henry
PF - Chief Kickingstallionsims
C - David Bower

[garbageman]

Sham Smith, Bulls.com: Who's the first player you're going to max when you get out of tax jail?

[jlmarines]

Sham Smith, Bulls.com: Who's the first player you're going to max when you get out of tax jail?

Michael Sneed for sure.

Sent from my moto g(7) supra using Tapatalk

[Eazy P]

Now that you are almost done serving your time in the SLOE maximum security tax jail, do you have a plan to avoid going back to jail?

[digiskunk]

"Divorced Dave" Dingleberry, Lifetime: Although Delmar Lopez is gone, you've managed to grab another b/b player in Myke Henry. What are your expectations for him—do you think he has the ability to lift the team higher in the standings? Moreover, will his recent domestic violence charge cast a negative shadow on the team?

[jlmarines]

Justin Bieber; Teremana.com: You mention Chief as a key player for your future success. Is there another younger player you expect to have a breakout season?

[K-100]

Sham Smith, Bulls.com: Who's the first player you're going to max when you get out of tax jail?

Michael Sneed for sure.

Just need you to decline that team option

[K-100]

Sham Smith, Bulls.com: Who's the first player you're going to max when you get out of tax jail?

Bey. Maybe Kai Jones too.

[K-100]

Now that you are almost done serving your time in the SLOE maximum security tax jail, do you have a plan to avoid going back to jail?

Not really, it is nice knowing I had the biggest debt in league history. If someone were to outdo me, I'd be lying if I said I would not do it again. But in the meantime, I dont mind the occassional 100-125 point penalty if it means I get a crack at title #2

[K-100]

"Divorced Dave" Dingleberry, Lifetime: Although Delmar Lopez is gone, you've managed to grab another b/b player in Myke Henry. What are your expectations for him—do you think he has the ability to lift the team higher in the standings? Moreover, will his recent domestic violence charge cast a negative shadow on the team?

I thinkbwe can do a little better with Myke than with Delmar because I like this season's frontcourt pairing of Bower/Chief K

Unfortunately, Myke is facing a league suspension. He is also not allowed to be alone with Akok Akok or Jeff Van Gundy.

[K-100]

Justin Bieber; Teremana.com: You mention Chief as a key player for your future success. Is there another younger player you expect to have a breakout season?

Good question. My hot take for S59 is Teddy Dizon finishes with a higher assists per game average than Geronimo De La Rosa. Book it.

[AngryBanana]

Chet Youbetcha, Dimmadome News: Do you plan to continue your bad woes for another season or two, for hopes of getting another good player and restocking your point bank, once you are out of jail or are you going full send again as quickly as possible?

Also, Who posts better memes, AB, K100, SD, or jlmarines?

[greepleairport]

Why are you the way that you are

[K-100]

Chet Youbetcha, Dimmadome News: Do you plan to continue your bad woes for another season or two, for hopes of getting another good player and restocking your point bank, once you are out of jail or are you going full send again as quickly as possible?

Also, Who posts better memes, AB, K100, SD, or jlmarines?

good question - I would like to tank more for stud rookies, but I am genuinely tired of seeing jlmarines winning. I must end that now. And greeple is in a tailspin too so that pleases me. It is time to show these suckers how to sim.

and me - @SuperDog's memes make me go awwww but my dawg aint got a vicious bone in his body

[K-100]

Why are you the way that you are

WHAT

U

MEAN?

[drkavarga]

With Bower starting do you think he can play like how he did for the Knicks or is he going to drop off again like he did after the trade last season?

[K-100]

With Bower starting do you think he can play like how he did for the Knicks or is he going to drop off again like he did after the trade last season?

To be honest, I think he will contribute even more than he ever did for the Knicks. You found a real diamond in the rough that just got buried on the depth chart because of Haun/Leonardo. I dont have that kind of frontcourt so Bower is going to be a major part of this team this season.

[drkavarga]

With Bower starting do you think he can play like how he did for the Knicks or is he going to drop off again like he did after the trade last season?

To be honest, I think he will contribute even more than he ever did for the Knicks. You found a real diamond in the rough that just got buried on the depth chart because of Haun/Leonardo. I dont have that kind of frontcourt so Bower is going to be a major part of this team this season.

I agree. He just a random player I added and it was by far one of the best signings I've ever made.