Dr. Ku's Deadline Diagnoses

[kucoach7]

Nets
Diagnosis: Honestly, this is a very solid all-around team. They don’t need much and they don’t really have a chip to go out and get a star upgrade. I think they should try to go for a cheap upgrade of Klay Thompson, who is playing 13 minutes per game as a backup wing. He can barely move and really lags the rest of the team on offense.

Prescription: See what Doug wants for Joe Oday. I had never heard of this guy before now but he could be a really solid rotation player on a good team. Klay and some points might be all it takes.

Sixers
Diagnosis: In a reloading year, for Scott, who clearly has his eye on the future, he’s probably not going to be too active at the deadline.

Prescription: See if Nick is interested in Lemke. Maybe he could get Muldrow out of the deal with the right package.

Raptors:
Diagnosis: This team lacks depth at the 1-3 and is over the cap, why not try to upgrade there with salary and points.
Prescription: Start making calls on any green/green or good y/y 1-3 with a cheap contract on a bad team. Maybe Doug Barber or Melvin McCall.

Celtics:
Diagnosis: Yes, they lack depth and I could write something boring about upgrading that but if I’m Conroy and I know I have to give JDLR a big contract after this year and I’m watching the All-star game and realizing that De La Rosa has never been an All-Star, I’m having some serious thoughts about trading him right now.

Prescription: Put JDLR on the block and see what you can get for him (it should be a lot).

Knicks:
Diagnosis: These guys are way over the cap and terrible. Gary Harris’s contract is movable to the right team.

Prescription: Ten points and whatever else it takes to unload Harris to the Grizzlies.

Pistons
Diagnosis: Typical top heavy Pistons with a young big waiting in the wings. Why do the Pistons always have a y/g or o/g big? Is Anthony Davis just that great of a mentor? These guys are desperate for another guard, especially with the injuries to Slice and Keitt. Chester Rusk just isn’t a good basketball player.

Prescription: Points and cap filler to the Pacers for Jeff Newsome or maybe think bigger and try to acquire Ernie Acuna from the Bucks for Gray, Rusk, and points. Acna is pretty promising, they might need to send a pick to make it happen and it might be worth it.

Bulls
Diagnosis: They seem to have given up on contending so they need to trade down and they seem particularly bent on trading Aaron Donald.

Prescription: Trade Donald and Monte Palmer (or some other cap piece) to the Cavs for Hardpeck and Romeo Langford.

Cavs
Diagnosis: The Cavs are flirting with mediocrity like they have for much of the Hardpeck era. They start a 6’4” dude at power forward alongside Dirk, who is a defensive liability. They have a promising young group on DSJ, Hawkins, and Petit. It is time for a change.

Prescription: Trade Hardpeck and Langford the the Bulls for Aaron Donald and Monte Palmer (or some other cap piece).

Bucks:
Diagnosis: The Bucks have an absurd collection of youth. They are just waiting for these guys to develop.

Prescription: Kieth Robinson to the Nuggets for points and salary.

Pacers
Diagnosis: This is a team that needs to bottom out and look to the future. KAT would be much better if he was playing PF. If teams read my piece on Paul George that was really about Damion McNary, they might realize this and be willing to give up something of value.

Prescription: KAT to the Cavs for Ed Monix and Gary Perez. The Cavs now have a starting lineup of DSJ, Hawkins, Petit, KAT, and Donald, with Chancelor coming off the bench (but they don’t have Bird rights for Hawkins so trading about Langford is a risky move but I say go for it. They need to spice things up).

Magic
Diagnosis: Wow, this team is stacked and three of their four best players are super young. They lack depth at the 1-3 spots, though.

Prescription: Start making calls on any green/green or good y/y 1-3 with a cheap contract on a bad team. Maybe Doug Barber or Melvin McCall.

Hawks
Diagnosis: I can never look at the Hawks roster without throwing up a little. This is them in a get-under-the-cap-and-reset mode. They look great now and in the future. Not thinking about whether they are set up to actually contend with the Magic now or later, they could use a legitimate defensive center.

Prescription: Points for Hassan Whiteside or someone like him.

Heat
Diagnosis: These guys are in a fight for their playoff lives and their very good starting power forward is out for the next month. They could really use someone to stop the bleeding.

Prescription: Try to get Kieth Robinsons off the Bucks for points and salary


Wizards
Diagnosis: How often are the Wizards in a position like this? They have their picks two of the next three years (not bad by Wiz standards). They look like a team that should blow it up but they probably can’t get much return on any of their guys.

Prescription: Chad Marsh for your pick back from the Jazz.

Bobcats
Diagnosis: Unfortunately Buddy and Kanter probably aren’t going anywhere. Bolton might bolt in free agency (he has a player option). So they should try to send him off for younger talent.

Prescription: Bolton to somewhere. The teams that would want him don’t have the goods to make a deal happen and the team with goods don’t want him. Doing this article was a bad idea.

Nuggets
Diagnosis: This team is very good but extremely old at the 3-5, okay, well, maybe everywhere except Jerry West.

Prescription: If Ryan is planning on riding out this Duren and West magic, he could try floating his two picks and matching salary for some of the 26-29 year olds b/b on a bad team. Otherwise, he’ll have enough cap space to go out and steal other peoples stars next offseason.

Blazers:
Diagnosis: A team patiently waiting for their young players to develop while dabbling in competing now. Marvin Bagley is still unhappy though, and has been for over two years now.

Prescription: Marvin Bagley and matching salary for Aaron Donald. #freebagley

T-Wolves
Diagnosis: Not a lot on this roster worth trading outside of Cheick Diallo. Maybe take a few calls on him.

Prescription: Cheick Diallo to the Nuggets for a future first.

Thunder
Diagnosis: They should be able to find a home for Alton Towers and Paul Webb. They both are good players on decent contracts. They probably can’t get any picks or prospects for them but I say just take the money and run.

Prescription: Paul Webb to the Pelicans for Bosworth and points.

Jazz
Diagnosis: Whittaker and Pulley are the obvious pieces to move here but Whitt is probably not going to get you anything and it isn’t clear Pulley will either, considering the Kings paid the Jazz to take him off their hands.

Prescription: Try to sell a borderline playoff on Pulley.

Suns
Diagnosis: This Suns team is much more balanced than the old Kevin Love prime squads but one thing still holds true, they still don’t have a legit pure point guard. The difference is that this time they could probably get one if they wanted to. They have some good cap filler they can move in Kyrie and a some interesting young talent in God’sgift and Michael Hunt.

Prescription: Kyrie and Michael Hunt to the Thunder for Paul Webb

Kings
Diagnosis: The Kings have a solid starting 5 and make the most of their no-name supporting cast but it would be nice if they could somehow sniff out an upgrade a backup small forward.

Prescription: Points and salary to the Bucks for Joe Oday (not sure if that is an upgrade but it is a trade and that is what I promised).

Lakers
Diagnosis: The Lakers have three good players and nothing else. They seems like a team that has actually been hurt by holding on to their draft picks because they have a bunch of rookie-contract guys over the min that can’t contribute much eating up all that precious cap space outside the big three. They either need to look for a two for one deal with one of their stars or trade their orange/green guys for someone that can actually play basketball.

Prescription: Damion Williams and salary to the Wizards for Victor Newman, Billy Kingston, and Marshall Star.

Warriors
Diagnosis: This team is just so disappointing. Three guys scoring 20+ a game and yet they have the 27th ranked offense in the league. They have Grim and Ellinger and they aren’t even close to being good. They don’t have a true SF that is ready to play now and Bradley Beal feels excessive. This is a team that is built to win now, I say they make a move to try to make the playoffs this year (a low bar in the West) and win big next year.

Prescription: Their first or Timo and Beal to the Bulls for Donald.

Clippers
Diagnosis: The Zach LaVine and Moses Barger deals may have ruined this team for the foreseeable future. It might be time to consider Emmitt McNeil, who is underperforming on a bad team but could be really good on the right team.

Prescription: Emmitt McNeil to the Wizards for Chad Marsh and matching salary

Spurs
Diagnosis: It’s hard to find a hole to fill on this squad. The price is pretty high though and about to get higher next season. They might consider trading Aguilar because he is expiring, pricey for a reserve, and they might not be able to bring him back next year.

Prescription: Aguilar to the Pistons for Gray and salary.

Rockets
Diagnosis: Great all-around team but they are paying a whole lot of money to two point guards and they have no prospects. It would be nice if they could swap one for a shooting guard or some youth.

Prescription: Desus Mero to the Suns for God’sgift, Michael Hunt, and Alan Snelling (or some combination of these guys)

Pelicans
Diagnosis: I don’t know if you’ve heard but the Pelicans are looking for a point guard.

Prescription: Saric, Muldrow, and Pastor (or some combination of these guys) for Mero

Mavs
Diagnosis: This team is kind of a mess. McCormick would be a better player on a better team. He is expiring but with bird rights and is only 29.

Prescription: McCormick to the Wizards for Marsh, Thurston, and whatever other salary needs to go.

Grizzlies
Diagnosis: These guys always need points right?

Prescription: Take on Knicks contracts for points.

[garbageman]

1838 words, 6 points, though I could almost dock you one for your own team's entry