76ers 2005-2006 Presser 'Crayola'

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ballsohard
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76ers 2005-2006 Presser 'Crayola'

Post by ballsohard »

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*** The media walks in to a slightly dimmed room. The stage is pitch black with nothing but a microphone and the championship trophy and a light on the trophy.The 76ers PR Man walks out to make an announcement.***
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Chang: Good afternoon, bitches. Balls O'Hard sent me out here to make an announcement. Unlike most of the other organizations, we're not phoning in our press conference. No, we're stepping it up. The 76ers organization has paid songwriter and artist Boosie to make their message to the league. After which, O'Hard himself will come out here to serve you.

*** Drops Mic***
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ballsohard
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Re: 76ers 2005-2006 Presser 'Crayola'

Post by ballsohard »

"Crayola"

phpBB [video]


Crayola, crayola.
I draft different colors every day.
I ain't playin with deez GMs, crying like baby.
GMs in the league hollin' Balls gone crazy.

Crayola, crayola.
I sign different colors every day.
I ain't playin with deez GMs, crying like baby.
GMs in the league hollin' Balls gone crazy.

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You might see me sign,
Yellow Point Guard, Yellow Small forward, Yellow Center.
Green SG, Green power forward, Green 6th man.
Blue starter, blue potential, blue MVP.
Orange 12th man, that dukes of hazard up in me.
Baron, pump fakin’, breakin ankles, so you can see.
Players candy red, bowlegged like candy red.
On sunday I be fastin, I hop up in my bentley.
Thank TC God’s up above for blessins he done sent me.
Green backup, call Daniels master splinter.
Glocks cocked, wildin' out hangin' out the window.
On Wednesdays Tayshaun chillin' but Childress swerv-IN.
Defeating' purples because im a CHAMPI-AN.
Too many players, ain't no room in my cap.
I go low key and I train they jump like they jaguars.(I'm BAllIN!)
GMs follow me round, Winosy tryn'a see.
But every player got rings, how you gon' deny it's me?

Crayola, crayola.
I draft different colors every day.
I ain't playin with deez GMs, crying like baby.
GMs in the league hollin' Balls gone crazy.

Crayola, crayola.
I sign different colors every day.
I ain't playin with deez GMs, crying like baby.
GMs in the league hollin' Balls gone crazy.

I got the lime green 6th man .
Can't start him bc his shot too cold, can't bench him if he too hot.
That Shot’ll make you pop.
Stagger screens in our playbook we got our own moves.
So you ain't gotta go to the trade block, just call Balls.
Yellow yellow yellow on my shit.
Match with my yellow 12th pick, The Central on my dick.
People don't understand how I floss like this thang
People like is that championship rangs
You know we ball on the week-END.
A line of player, bad broads tryna jump IN.
Yellow, yellow, green, green, my self esteem high.
When it be rainin' man we shootin like old school.
When it's a game it's like a train when we roll thru.
Ya feel me man?

Big stacks on deck, get out the BD's way.
I'm like, Baron gon drive today?
Crayola crayola.


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NOLa.
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Re: 76ers 2005-2006 Presser 'Crayola'

Post by NOLa. »

God......damn.......brilliant

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ballsohard
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Re: 76ers 2005-2006 Presser 'Crayola'

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***Boosie leaves the stage and Balls O'Hard walks to the microphone. O'Hard walks up and looks at the Larry O'Brien trophy, as if he's saying farewell. He gathers himself, clears his throat and begins.***

Balls O'Hard: Good afternoon, and thank you for joining me. First off, WOW! What a great season we had last year. What an unexpectedly great season we had. There were a lot of people in this league being picked to win the championship at the beginning of the season. Hell, even at the start of the playoffs and we weren't one of them. I'm not saying that to come out here an finger wag the community for "not believing" in us. We didn't think as a management group, as a team that we were ready for the big time. We had young guys who'd never been there before. We had a whole new roster outside of 3 players, and we had a lot of growing to do.

Balls O'Hard: Around the midpoint of the season, the front office and the coaching staff got together when we were a few games over .500 and decided to experiment a little. Afterall, what'd we have to lose? A lot of us thought we'd be a lottery team anyway. We kept throwing different lineups out there, and the team kept winning. eventually, snagging the 5 seed. Again, going into the playoffs we didn't have a lot to lose. We decided to be flexible with our gameplan, even running lineups we haden't seen nor had any clue how it'd mesh. With each loss, the team responded. With each series win we became more confident. Our first two rounds, we had to go into a more talented team's house and win; and we did.

Balls O'Hard: After Round 2, it seemed the worst was behind us. We'd just taken down a juggernaut in the Wizards and got home court for the first time. We were playing free flowing basketball with trust, respect, and an understanding of roles within the group. We always knew we weren't the best team out there in terms of talent, but for those last two series we believed, and we showed that there is a balance of power within Cohesion and Talent. We pulled off the impossible and this organization and it's fans know what it's like to be a champion!!!


Balls O'Hard: Unfortunately, by the time you recognize how special the moment is, the moment is gone. And we have to treat it as such if we want to continue to be successful. A lot will be the same as last year. We will expect Baron to the the engine that drives us. As he goes we will go. The top of the league has gotten more talented though and that's not something we could ignore. The Toronto Raptors were sellers early on in the market, siting they wanted to get younger, so we worked out a deal with them for the very talented Michel Finley. At one point in time, Finley was the marquee 2 in the league, and we're expecting to see flashes of that through this year. Mike may not be the athlete he was in his early 20's, but he does everything still at a high level. He's a good scorer, passer, ball handler, and defender. He will be a huge help to a team who ranked middle of the pack on offense.


Balls O'Hard: in the draft we had the opportunity to take a few guys we had our eye on a few guys, but ultimately went with Marcin Gortat. With our loss of Shawn Bradley, who was instrumental in our playoff run. We are hopeful that Gortat can eventually crack our line-up in the next few years and possible take over the 5 spot. He's a long way from there and it will take time, so we don't want to get ahead of ourselves.

Balls O'Hard: One thing I've always aimed at getting in free agency is a backup player who can play both the 1 and 2. We were ecstatic to get Antonio Daniels to sign on. With Antonio, we get a guy who can handle the ball, do a little play making, scoring in spots as well as defend both positions. He's a huge luxury to have on the bench. We're praying we don't have to use him as a replacement for injury, but if we do we'll be comfortable with him production.

Balls O'Hard: As far as our training camp report from the coaches, we've got a bit of a mixed bag. We've seen great things out of BD, he's really seen success and is working harder to stay on top. That's a refreshing sign. Tayshaun has really owned up to learning his craft, which is defense. After being placed on each team's most dangerous scorer, whether they were a 2, a 3 or a 4, he locked down. It invigorated him that we had that trust and it gave him confidence seeing what the other coaches would do to keep that player away from him. We need consistency from him and he looks to be on the right path. Scola is still adjusting the the NBA game, but he's progressing nicely. We gave him the opportunity last year to ear the starting spot, and he was not ready, but this training camp has shown he is. He will be a key in our rebounding game, as well as be asked to score a bit too. Louis has been putting in extra time in the weight room as well now that he understands his new responsibility.

Balls O'Hard: That about wraps it up guys, please let me know if you have any questions. Thank you for coming!
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Re: 76ers 2005-2006 Presser 'Crayola'

Post by IamQuailman »

Congrats on the Championship! Preliminary Depth Charts have Paul McPherson (the unheralded playoff MVP) getting 0 minutes. Do you attribute this to gaining depth or has he fallen out of favor with the coaching staff?
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Re: 76ers 2005-2006 Presser 'Crayola'

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GWR: Congrats on your title. You had the benefit of sneaking up on teams last year. That surprise is gone. Do you think Baron and Prince are ready to be the hunted after such a successful year as the hunter?
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Re: 76ers 2005-2006 Presser 'Crayola'

Post by NOLa. »

Congrats on the repeat!

Is it true that Childress indeed "'flew too close to the sun"?"

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Re: 76ers 2005-2006 Presser 'Crayola'

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JNR wrote:GWR: Congrats on your title. You had the benefit of sneaking up on teams last year. That surprise is gone. Do you think Baron and Prince are ready to be the hunted after such a successful year as the hunter?

Balls O'Hard: Hunter/ Hunted is all a matter of perspective, especially to this group. It's really hard to say, you're being hunter when we have 1 all league player and he's third at that. It's clear the respect level for our team still needs to be earned. Teams like the Kings, the Bucks and the Magic will continue to make the headlines, and we will have to be a reflection of our city; blue collar.
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Re: 76ers 2005-2006 Presser 'Crayola'

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IamQuailman wrote:Congrats on the Championship! Preliminary Depth Charts have Paul McPherson (the unheralded playoff MVP) getting 0 minutes. Do you attribute this to gaining depth or has he fallen out of favor with the coaching staff?

Balls O'Hard: thank you for the congratulations. Your bucks will be formidable this season. as for Paul, we kind of know what we have in him. We also know Paul is always ready to play. He had only been play 8 mpg and started 0 games during the reg season, but when his number was called he was ready. I think next year will be a gigantic year for him.
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76ers 2005-2006 Presser 'Crayola'

Post by ballsohard »

NOLa. wrote:Congrats on the repeat!

Is it true that Childress indeed "'flew too close to the sun"?"

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Balls O Hard: Josh is black, his skin tone has nothing to do with being burned by the sun. Where do you get these questions, sheesh.
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Re: 76ers 2005-2006 Presser 'Crayola'

Post by coltsguy510 »

Congrats on your game planning genius! Do you plan on playing Scola at C?
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Re: 76ers 2005-2006 Presser 'Crayola'

Post by ballsohard »

coltsguy510 wrote:Congrats on your game planning genius! Do you plan on playing Scola at C?

Not too often. Scola still has a ways to go as far as being conditioned. We think roughly 30 mpg this season will help him reach new heights.
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