#SLOE: People's Basketball Sim League

Yet another season has come to a close, and the cycle begins anew. Once again, teams look towards the offseason to change the future of their franchises. For many, this all starts with the draft, a gathering of the superstars of tomorrow. Where will the stars land? Nobody knows...but it's fun to guess!


#1 - Giannis Antentokounmpo, Lakers

JNR wrote: Sat Mar 04, 2017 2:14 pm Giannis isn't even that good guys

As a GM who has quite a bit of experience with 6'10" swingmen, Giannis is one of the best prospects in this draft, and if his offense improves (B INS potential, A JPS potential), he could be Top 5 in the league someday. 6'11" players simply aren't supposed to be this fast and athletic (76 QKN, 61 STR, 80 JMP, 90 STA) or have the ability to guard SGs, SFs, and PFs capably right away (45 PSD, 51 PRD, 60 STL, 42 BLK, B potential everywhere). Make no mistake, he will be a liability on offense (30s across the board in INS, JPS, 3PS, HND, and PAS) throughout the length of his rookie deal, but defensively? He has a good chance to be Rob Horry-level by year 3. This is exactly the shot in the arm the other LA team needed, especially when you bring Bogut into the equation. Though the Lakers probably would've liked a flashier, more offensively capable centerpiece, the sheer potential of the Greek Freak's just too much to pass on.


#2 - Rudy Gobert, Bucks

Quail's team is in extremely odd position for a rebuilding team: They have young talent everywhere, but few of them are ready to really contribute. Though the rumors surrounding Kyrie last season would seem to indicate that they're ready to move on from the KKK wing crew...

...I think they'll overcompensate for being undersized by drafting 7'2" Frenchman Rudy Gobert. Let's get this out of the way, Enes Kanter is in no way, shape, form, or fashion a starting NBA center right now. They have Biedrins, but his age doesn't match up with the rest of the team. Rudy will not only solidify the post defensively for Quail right away (61 PSD, 55 BLK), but he'll also stay out of everybody's way on offense.. until they brick it and he rebounds (51 ORB and 56 DRB), then kicks it back out for another brick (46 PAS). And so the sad cycle continues...all jokes aside, this is just too perfect a pick for the Bucks...which means they'll probably trade #2, #6, and Faried for Bosh or something.


#3 - CJ McCollum, Sonics

With the 3rd pick in the 2013 draft, the computer will select CJ McCollum. Why? Because he's projected to go #1 for some reason, and Seattle's GM is a huge analytics guy who will do whatever the computer tells him to. Except put him at PG, because that's just stupid. Seriously though, McCollum is to offense what Giannis and Rudy are to defense...combined. With 45 INS, 55 JPS, 75 3PS, and A potential in all of them, CJ can get buckets. What he can't do is defend (36 PRD) or facilitate (31 HND, 24 PAS), making him a poor choice for a point guard and a good choice for Isaiah Thomas' running mate. With both boasting 90+ QKN, opposing teams will have to deal with a backcourt that's not just fast, it's...well...

#4 - Victor Oladipo, Raptors

Like the Lakers, the Raptors have been going through a slow, long, decline. Unlike the Lakers, they have more than one young guy ready to turn things around. With Whiteside, Aminu, and Green all on the roster, it's pretty clear that Wave intends to build a massive defensive wall separating one part of North America from the other. Wait, why does that sound familiar...



...Oh. OH. Erm, well, Oladipo fits right into Sound's defensive blueprints, as his defensive ratings (58 PRD, 54 STL, B potential in both) are quite nice for a combo guard, and though he won't remind Raps fans of Chauncey Billups anytime soon (40 HND, 31 PAS, C potential in both), just the fact that he can pretend to be a PG helps out the wingless scaly birds.


#5 - Otto Porter Jr., 76ers



...must be nice to be able to already have a younger replacement for your RFA in case he gets overpaid. Even the website doesn't care enough to load Otto's picture.

This is a hard draft to predict.


#6 - Dennis Schröder, Bucks

So if Quail stays the course and drafts Gobert, this is his reward. Now, Bucks fans no longer have to be subjected to the terrifying sight that is Kyrie Irving trying to run an offense. Dennis gives Kemba a very solid backup who, while still able to score (41 INS, 46 JPS, 51 JPS), can actually keep the offense running (51 HND, 50 PAS). He can't defend, like, at all (45 PRD), which will probably tempt Quail to go big again and draft 7-footer Kelly Olynyk, 6'11" Nerlens Noel, or 6'11" Mason Plumlee, but Dennis is a better all-around fit. The computer doesn't share my optimism though, which is why it has declined to give me a picture. Is it an omen?


#7 - Nerlens Noel, Spurs

Even though the cap crunch continues in San Antonio, GM Eazy's past deals continue to supply him with cheap, young talent. This year's model is named Nerlens Noel, and he projects to be a defensive freak at the center position (A potential in STL, B everywhere else...yes, even PRD), with the speed (50 QKN) to react well to damn near anything coming at him. Add that to a probable return for RFA Jordan Hill and UFA Josh Smith, and you have a strong defensive frontcourt that, when paired with Westbrook and Afflalo, can still cause trouble in the West. And even if Eazy sacrifces Josh and AA in the name of the tax, Noel/Hill/Westbrook is a very solid fresh start, especially on the defensive end.


#8 Kentavious Caldwell-Pope

After last year's pick Terrence Ross didn't pan out, the Pistons will look to try again with KCP. Now, while smart money would say that Tim Hardaway Jr. would be a better fit for Detroit's "SF of the Future" status, all he really can do is shoot, shoot, shoot, no matter what. The Pistons' overall roster is so weak, though, that they need all the help they can get. KCP has a shot at being a decent all-around player (B potential in JPS, 3PS, PRD, and STL, as well as 43 HND and 30 PAS), which has to make him a better choice to pair with the also one-dimensional Bradley Beal than Lil' Timmy. He'll also serve as a bigger backup plan if Beal, like Ross, doesn't meet expectations.


#9 - Mason Plumlee, Raptors

Aminu may be solid defensively, but having an undersized PF limits Sound's defensive gameplan somewhat. Enter Mason Plumlee, who definitely has the size (6'11") to give Whiteside the help he needs. He fits right in on the defensive end, of course, with B potential in all the right areas. What will really help is his passing ability. 46 PAS for a big is pretty darn good, and very valuable when you don't really have a reliable floor leader and need the entire team to help each other out. Honestly, Mason's a candidate to go a bit higher to the Spurs instead of Noel, because he's more likely to produce now. Should that happen, Sound'll just snap up Noel instead and put his speed to work at PF. Either way, Eazy and Sound come out of the lotto feeling pretty good.


#10 - Michael Carter-Williams, Suns

Given how set they are when it comes to frontcourt play, the Suns were probably hoping to pick up KCP as insurance for Waiters. Though the temptation remains for them to draft another gunner in Lil' Timmy, Aaron Brooks isn't getting any younger, so MCW seems like the smarter choice. At 6'6", he's a better option than Dion at SG when it comes to size, and the fact that he knows how to use his size (60 DRB) only makes things better. His B potential in passing gives him a small (very small...28 PAS) chance at eventually succeeding Brooks as Phoenix's PG moving forward, which could turn the Suns into a nightmare matchup for opposing teams with MCW joining 7'1" Moz, 6'10" Love, and 6'10" Beasley.


#11 - Robert Covington, Mavericks

We don't know much about what direction the Mavs' GM wants to take his team, but we do know a few things: DeRozan and Holiday are probably coming back, Oden's an average center, and Brook Lopez is still pretty darn good. What we don't know is how Tobias Harris will fare as the team's future SF, so that's one big reason why Covington's a good fit. Another good reason is his defense. 61 STL is great, A potential is even better, and the ability to defend the post (50 PSD) and the perimeter (48 PRD) is just extra gravy. Given that Jrue and Oden are the only Mavs that could be could be called anything other than "average" on D, Covington's the kind of guy they need to take a chance on.


#12 - Gorgui Dieng, Rockets

It seems like we've been waiting forever for the Rockets' youth movement to pay off, but it just hasn't happened yet. With Horford getting older, Diogu and Brewer UFAs, and Lawson set to get paid in RFA, now might be the time to think about what comes next. With that in mind, I think 78 will choose to draft his future C in Dieng. Dieng's NBA-ready without a doubt (56 ORB, 61 DRB, 63 PSD, and 58 BLK), and has a surprisingly nice jumper for a big (48 JPS). The potential is there for a truly terrifying defensive combo with Dieng/Biyombo, and that's exactly the kind of clear direction and rebuilding focus the Rockets seem to have been searching for.


#13 - Kelly Olynyk, Celtics

Personally, I hope he drafts Lil' Timmy for the lulz, but that doesn't make much sense from a team standpoint. Relying on Craig Smith to hold down the PF spot also doesn't make any sense, so Olynyk's a much better choice. Height is Olynyk's biggest strength, as a 7' PF sounds real good when put alongside the 7'1" Spencer Hawes. Other than that, though...Olynyk's a tweener disguised as a big, with no real standout skills other than...wait for it...3-point shooting (64 3PS with A potential). Oh joy. How's he gonna take advantage of his other decent skill (50 ORB, B potential) when he's jacking threes? Who knows. What I do know is that given what else is left on the board, this is probably the best fit Conroy can get. Scary, huh?

This is an "okay" draft at best, and I can't see too many of these guys making it to the end of their rookie contracts if TC doesn't save them. Unfortunately, that make my job of guessing who goes where much, much harder.

#14 - Tim Hardaway Jr., Pacers
I honestly have no idea where this team is headed. I'm picking Pauly to go with Lil' Timmy here, because what he brings (offense) is what they really seem to need. Deron should appreciate having at least one scorer to pass to, I guess.

#15 - Steven Adams, Nets
Another team that seems to be stuck in neutral. They've done a good job developing bigs lately, so drafting Adams to eventually team with Tristan makes sense. He's also young enough to sit and wait while RPF tries to figure out just what to do with Kaman/Nelson/Young.

#16 - Seth Curry, Celtics
The reaching begins with Seth, who isn't a PG in any way, but his defensive potential makes him a better pick than McLemore or Dellavedova for SG. Seth's height (6'2") is the lone red flag.

#17 - Dewayne Dedmon, Sonics
A bit of a diamond in the rough, Dewayne's an NBA-ready big whose lack of speed and athleticism caused him to drop off people's radars. This could turn out to be a steal for the Sonics, especially if they manage to retain Blake. Every star PF can use a true banger at C to help lighten the load.

#18 - Shane Larkin, Wizards
Drafts like these are why I tend to trade my picks, honestly. Jack's not gonna be around forever, so I need a backup PG who can run an offense. But that's darn near impossible in this draft, so I'll just grab a little defensive bug to keep the defensive pressure up when Tyreke's on the bench.

#19 - Cody Zeller, Jazz
I don't think they'll keep Zaza at PF much longer, so Zeller's as good a possible replacement as anyone else left, honestly. Lile Olynyk, only worse.

#20 - Nick Calathes, Raptors
Not a bad choice to possibly play alongside Oladipo, all things considered. He can keep the ball secure, pass a little, and defend. Unathletic as can be, though.

#21 - Jeff Withey, Trail Blazers
Tall, fast for his height, reasonably athletic, and NBA-ready on D. Not bad for this draft.

#22 - Ben McLemore, Bucks
Look, offense! Well, maybe if TC blesses him. If not? He can...he can't really do anything else, can he?

#23 - Matthew Dellavedova, Spurs
A low-end 3&D combo guard. Worth giving a shot, to counter Jimmer's offense-only approach if nothing else.

#24 - Andre Roberson, Kings
When in doubt, draft a defensive guy. Best played at SF though - 56 QKN won't cut it at SG.

#25 - Alex Len, Heat
Okay, this is a decent pick. Despite being an athletic apocalypse, he has solid skills, fills a position of need, and is young enough to possibly be a part of the Knight/Jennings/Ibaka/Mayo future. Nice.

#26 - Shabazz Muhammad, T-Wolves
I'm not sure if the roster we see now will be the roster we see later, but Muhammad's a decent fit, I suppose. Reasonably athletic with scoring ability. Might pair well with Thornton.

#27 - Ryan Kelly, Clippers
Maybe the mighty Kevin Durant will share his ungodly secrets with a lowly peasant such as Ryan Kelly, unlocking the abilities within him to be a speedy, 6'11" 3&D terror......nah. Sounded good though.

#28 - Aron Baynes, Bulls
Bulls need a big man to play backup PF. Aron is a big man who plays PF. Oh my goodness, what a perfect fit! This is gonna be great!


#29 - Vitor Faverani, Hawks
If Vitor becomes a legitimately useful NBA player, there can only be one explanation - Wig really is a cat. Specifically, this cat:


It's the only way.


Well that was painful. Hopefully the next time I do this it won't be quite as crushingly soul-killing. As always, thanks for reading...and good luck with your picks if you have them. Seriously, good luck. Sheesh.

NOLa. wrote: Sat Mar 04, 2017 8:00 pm Kings send:
DeMarcus Cousins
Heat 2015

76ers send:
Tyson Chandler
76ers #5


As always good talks man.

Thanks for nothing, guys.

Anyway, not sure where Nola's going with this. #5 is pretty much the last pick before it all goes to hell, meaning the Kings are guaranteed to grab whoever the other four don't want (likely Porter). We just know two things: One, Granger isn't going to to say in Sac-Town; and two, this will most certainly work out in Balls' favor.

Thank you for your media contribution, Xist. Here's +5 for your article.