#SLOE: People's Basketball Sim League

Wilbon: Pardon the Interruption but I'm Mike Wilbon. We just passed the PBSL All Star Break and the race for the playoffs is really heating up. Tony, you excited about the playoff race?
Kornheiser: Pardon the Interruption, I'm Tony Kornheiser. Mike the only race I'm excited about is the human race, let's all just give each other a big hug.

Wilbon: No thanks, stay on that side of the table. Today we're going to talk about All Star snubs, we're going to talk about the 2012 PBSL Draft, and we're gonna play Tony's favorite game, Roleplay.

Kornheiser: I won't even expand on that, Mike, this is a PG show. Let's get to the headlines!
Kornheiser: As you so eloquently mentioned at the top of the show, Mike, the All Star game has come and went. Laughs were had, tears were shed, some rando named Craig Smith won the dunk contest, and the East won by 15 points. But even with all the hoopla of All Star Weekend, there was one glaring omission: the MVP Chris Bosh. Bosh broke his jaw earlier in the week and missed the All Star Game, which would be fine if he was just named an all star on injured reserve. But with PBSL rules, his spot was given to the next man up and Bosh doesn't even get a mention. I repeat: MVP Chris Bosh, he of 32 and 10 a game, is not an All Star this year. Is the system broken, Mike?

Wilbon: I'll agree it's broken, but I'm not as outraged as you seem to be about it.

Kornheiser: I am outraged.

Wilbon: You shouldn't be. Why does it matter? We know how good Bosh is. We see his numbers, we see his dominance, and we know he's one of the two best players in the world along with Kevin Durant. Why do we need to call him an all star? It's not like not being an all star suddenly takes away from how good he is. He's still one of the best in the game.

Kornheiser: He's the best in the game, Michael, and it does matter. All Star appearances matter. They're what drive contract negotiations. They're what convince members of the Hall of Fame committee to induct or reject a potential candidate.

Wilbon: The Hall of Fame system is broken too, and its committee sucks.

Kornheiser: The chairperson is awful, but that's a different story for a different day. Bottom line, Bosh should be an all star, and a freak elbow to the mouth shouldn't have the power to change that. What's next?
Wilbon: Speaking of all stars and injuries, Philadelphia 76ers guard Dwyane Wade lasted exactly one minute in their game against the Hornets this week. He got hit on a dunk, made the shot and the free throw, and promptly left the game with a hobbled foot. That foot turned out to be broken, and the Sixers are now looking to be without Wade for the next 50 or so days. That's almost the rest of the season. The Sixers are enjoying a comfortable lead in the East, but can they keep it without their three-time champ?

Kornheiser: Obviously they will keep their lead. I have a couple of numbers for you. Actually, no -- I have the same number for you twice, just in different contexts. The number is four. Four as in "four games above the next best team in the East." But also four as in "4-0 since Wade went down" if you count the 47 minutes Wade missed against the Hornets as a full game. Losing Wade hurts, but this team wins because of more than just Wade, who is only scoring 15 points per game by the way.

Wilbon: Is Wade the dominant force he was a few years ago? No, he's not. But the Sixers will definitely miss him, Tone. They have some tough opponents coming up. The Pacers, the Kings, the Cavs all in the next month. Four games isn't as big as you make it sound, and who knows if Kobe and Rudy can keep up their production in his place. I'd be a little worried if I were Philly.
Kornheiser: It's February, Wilbon, and get this -- the Pacers are good.

Wilbon: Wow!

Kornheiser: I know! Last year was the first time the Pacers had made the playoffs since 2004, but not the first time they had looked good at some point in the season. It always seemed the Pacers started off hot and cooled down. But here we are, past the all star break, and the Pacers still look good. Mozgov and Gortat have formed a European Lockdown in the paint, Richard Jefferson is killing it on the wing, and Deron Williams is the best point guard in the league. The Pacers haven't been out of the first round since 1990 -- since when we both had hair, Wilbon! Do they break that streak this year?

Wilbon: I've been bicking my head since the 80s, Tony. And yes, it's the year they break the streak. You need two things to survive in the playoffs -- home court and defense. And with the third seed and the eighth best defense, they've got both. I think this is finally a year for the Pacers to make some serious playoff noise.

Kornheiser: Back in our Binghamton club lacrosse league we had a saying: "You are who you are until you're not."

Wilbon: How poetic.

Kornheiser: Thank you. Basically it means you get judged based on what you've done, not what you can do. I don't care about how good Deron Williams is, I don't care about how good their defense is. Under the current GM, the Pacers have made the playoffs 11 times and made it out of the first round ONCE. O-N-C-E ONCE. You are who you are until you're not. And until the Pacers prove to me they can be a deep playoff contender, I refuse to believe it.

Wilbon: I guess nothing ever changes. We'll be right back with Fill in the Blank.

Kornheiser: Welcome back to the show, guys. It’s time for What’s The Word, and for that we bring in Anthony Joseph Paul John Berlin Wall Reali.



Reali: All right gentlemen. The Knicks owning three of the projected top ten picks including the projected top pick in the draft is what, Tony?

Kornheiser: It’s RIDICULOUS, Reali. It’s ridiculous that the Pistons are continually shipping off top picks and getting nothing in return. The Knicks are smart but the Pistons GM needs to put a sticky note on his office phone that reads DO NOT TRADE ANY MORE FIRST ROUNDERS.

Wilbon: It’s NECESSARY for the Knicks. This draft isn’t great, so you may as well get as many as you can and hope one of them strikes paydirt. The Knicks GM really wants to be bad, but as long as teams are willing to give up prime draft picks, maybe he doesn’t need to be. Hopefully one of these turn into a real star for him.

Reali: Kevin Durant’s statline so far this season is what, Wilbon?

Wilbon: It’s MCGRADYESQUE. The assists may not be there, but this man is scoring 37 points a game with 7 rebounds scoring 1.63 points per shot. That’s insane. That’s incredible. We’ve only seen efficiency like this before in the league from the big guys, Penny, T-Mac, Kemp. Add this kid to the list, Tony. He’s a legend already.

Kornheiser: And he’s 23, Mike. It’s UNFAIR. What do you even do with that? He’s the MVP of the league in my mind, and I don’t think it’s going to be close. We’ve seen Rashard Lewis average scoring numbers like this on middling teams, but he’s taking a contender to new heights while putting up video game numbers. It’s unfair to the rest of the league.

Reali: Last one. The Magic are first in offense, last in defense. The performance of the Magic this year under new GM false9 is what, Tony.

Kornheiser: LEADFOOTED. It looks like Carmelo and Rashard have roots in the ground the way they let everyone go by. If I am Goran Dragic I'm embarrassed to share the court with these schlubs.

Wilbon: Schlubs? SCHLUBS! You're calling a guy who averages 25 points a game a schlub?!

Kornheiser: He's a defensive schlub.

Wilbon: He's a schlub in no way. The defense may be bad, but their performance is ENTERTAINING, Tony. They score better than anyone in the league. They get up and down the court so fast, and they've got deadly players at every position. I don't care how much they give up, it just means they have more time to score more points. Give me points, Tony!

Kornheiser: I'll give you something, all right. One more break and we'll finish up with Roleplay and the Big Finish.

Part 3 will come later in the afternoon, maybe evening

Loving it so far, Raby!

<3

Always love these. +1

Sent from my SM-S765C using Tapatalk

Wilbon: Hey guys, we're going to do a little Roleplay. Who am I?
Kornheiser: You're Cavaliers guard Chris Paul. Your team is as good as it ever has been. You're leading the division by two games and post the second best scoring numbers in the league. But personally, you're averaging 3.5 less points, three fewer assists, are posting one of the worst A/TO ratios of your career, plus your FG% isn't great. Are you conflicted despite how good your team has been?

Wilbon: Are you nuts? What are stats? We're 36 and 14. Have you seen Carlos Boozer? He's looking like a superstar. If I have to take a backseat so Carlos can dominate and we can win, you better believe I'm hopping back there like my buddy just called shotgun. As long as we're winning I could average 5 and 2.

Kornheiser: You're lying to yourself and you know it. Who am I?
Wilbon: You're Spurs GM Eazy P, and you've had the Midwest division in your grasps for years. You traded your defensive center for Kevin Garnett's aging contract in a move that made it seem you're not trying to unseat the Wolves from the top spot. Are you conceding to the tax man, Eazy?

Kornheiser: I sure am, have you seen those penalties? Look, division titles are for inexperienced GMs to rave about. I only care about titles. And I think that even with my tax moves, my team can come out of the West once the playoffs start. And if we can't? Then we save a bit of money and try again in a few years. The Midwest will be mine again, don't worry.

Wilbon: Financial for the future, I respect it. Who am I?
Kornheiser: You're Celtics forward Carl Landry. You're 6th among all power forwards in scoring with 21 and a half points per game. In the offseason you signed a huge deal that many saw as an overpay. Do you think you're overpaid?

Wilbon: I'm not over-anything, Tony. I'm underappreciated. I'm underrated. After this season I may be proving I'm underpaid. I joined a team with playoff hopes that lost its star player twice to injuries this year. We should be bottom of the barrel without Jared. But my scoring and my leadership has this team fighting for the 7th seed. My GM knows what he's doing, he doesn't make bad decisions so people should've known that when he signed me, he saw something he liked. If Jared were healthy we'd be four seed or better, book it.

Kornheiser: You're under the weather if you think that. Okay, last one, who am I?
Wilbon: You're Bulls new GM garbageman. Nice stache, by the way. You started the season in a rough fashion, trading your draft pick for a few players who some people said were on a downward trajectory. You were sitting at 10-17 at one point, but you made some adjustments and you've gone 13-7 since. Is this the start of the most successful Bulls regime we've seen?

Kornheiser: If it is, it's the start of the start. Let's not get ahead of ourselves, we've got a long way to go. Harden is there, but Hayward isn't yet. All the same, it felt good to make adjustments and see them bear fruit. Plus, I could run around pantsless and still be better than some GMs. I may end up doing that anyway.

Wilbon: Please don't. Okay, Reali, what did we miss.
Reali: Well you missed a huge trade. You asked how the Sixers would fare without Wade, well they just traded Wade to Toronto for Tracy McGrady.

Wilbon: WOAH.

Reali: And Tony you called Mozgov and Gortat European Lockdown, but 77% of Russia is in Asia.

Kornheiser: Still European in parts. All right, let's get ready for the Big Finish.
Wilbon: The Nuggets have put Rajon Rondo on the trade block for today's deadline. Think he gets dealt today?

Kornheiser: I think people will try to get cute and he'll stay in Denver for another year. Offseason, though. The Heat have a top 8 offense and a top 6 defense. Are they a darkhorse in the East?

Wilbon: They've gotta be, Al Jefferson is the kind of center GMs dream about. Hornets forward Caron Butler is reportedly writing a book about his upbringing called Tuff Juice. Are you gonna read it?

Kornheiser: I'd rather read about him sharing a locker room with Stephen Jackson, I bet that was a riot. The Grizz continue to position themselves for a top spot. Would landing AD make them the team of the future?

Wilbon: Hmm, let's see, three of the most athletic defensive minded players we've seen in a long time, I wonder if that would be good. DUH. If the playoffs ended now the 8 seeds would be the Nets and Sonics, which one causes the most fear for the 1 seeds?

Kornheiser: I'll take the one that doesn't have a losing record. Oh wait, that's both of them. The Kings are 27-22 and have a great defense, but Boogie Cousins is only averaging 10 points a game. What's wrong with your boy, Wilbon?

Wilbon: Nothing's wrong with my boy, he's gonna be a stud. Just you wait.

Kornheiser: OK that's it, we're out of time, try to do better next time.

Wilbon: See you later, knuckleheads. Don't forget to subscribe to our podcast on iTunes.

Woman whisper: PTI...

Always awesome

good stuff my man

Thank you for your media contribution. Here is +5 points for your article.

Loved it, the roleplay segment was great

Awesome article JNR.