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ESPN Breaking News - Press Conference Pending from Denver

Posted: Sun Feb 21, 2016 8:07 pm
by TheSyndicate
Dan Patrick wrote:Image
Well, Stu, the NBA experience some of the most significant changes in its history his past offseason. The leadership core of many teams became cloudier, franchise trajectories were drastically altered due to luxury tax penalties, and a massive initiative to draw more fans from the Latino community was in its final stage - seeing multiple Hispanic players drafted and even a Spanish-speaking GM appointed. One leadership situation has now become much clearer, for this story, our Kenny Maybe reports from Denver. Kenny,
Kenny Mayne wrote:Image
‘Thanks Dan, or should I say, “¡Gracias!”’ That’s right, we’re here in Denver at the Nuggets training facility where John Schnatter is addressing the media. He’s expected to announce that he and the rest of the Papa John's family are actually the people behind The Syndicate who have run this Nuggets team for the last decade-plus. He looks like he’s settling in behind the podium, so let’s watch.’
Image
Thank you all for joining me. My name is John Schnatter and as you all have heard by now, the Papa John's family (including Peyton, here) and I are behind what has been known as The Syndicate. Contrary to popular belief, The Syndicate is not a mob or gang engaged in any illegal activity, but with the lack of performance this team has shown on the court for most of that time we thought it prudent for our safety to remain behind a guise.

We actually run a fairly successful pizza chain, and we hope to lure not only top-flight basketball talent to Denver, but also football-playing potential spokespeople in the near to distant future. Now that you know who we are, I’d like to walk you through a bit of the past, present, and future of this Nuggets team.

Several seasons back, we engaged in a 5 year plan to reinvigorate this franchise, the fanbase, and ultimately compete for a championship. We sold off our veterans for points and draft picks, we fielded an team that was an embarrassment to the league in an effort to obtain a young core of players to build around. This resulting in the drafting of Dwyane Wade, and trade for Gilbert Arenas within years 1 and 2 of that plan. In year 3, we utilized the picks we had been stockpiling to obtain Kevin Garnett and (at the trade deadline) Donyell Marshall. We felt this team had a chance to win a championship and made a late run that year. Unfortunately, we ran up against a juggernaut in the playoffs, losing in the first round.

Last season, we felt with a full off-season of practice and work together, we could again have a chance to go all the way. This time, we moved past a tough opponent in round one by winning a clinching game 7 on the road. In the second round, we once again encountered a juggernaut in the eventual NBA champion, Sacramento Kings. After splitting the first four games, our coach made a risky change in the game-plan. It back-fired badly and we succumbed in 6 games. We feel proud, still, of this result consider we won 2 more games than the Kings would relent in the next two series combined.

This brings us to this season - the fifth season of five in the original five-year plan. This off-season we made a couple of win-now decisions. While we are all-in to win a ring this year, we would not make any moves we felt jeopardized our future outlook, either.

Move 1: Deciding to trade the immense potential, blazing speed, and questionable shot selection of Gilbert Arenas to the Milwaukee Bucks for veteran All-Star point guard Chauncey Billups and up-and-coming forward Eddie Griffin. In this deal, we feel as though we improved our offense through a point guard that will take care of the ball, our defense as both Griffin and Billups defend their positions exceptionally well, our depth up front, and ultimately our chances at winning an NBA Championship. In Griffin, we also received a young player on a team-friendly contract with potential to grow. We see him as a part of this team for years to come.

Move 2: Deciding to trade Donyell Marshall and our 2009 First-Round Pick to the Orland Magic for Keith Van Horn. Before trading Gilbert to the Bucks we were in talks with several other teams for blockbuster deals. After ultimately settling on the deal for Billups, an opportunity presented itself to work with a team desperate not only to relieve itself of salary this year, but long-term as well. Donyell perform extremely well since we acquired him, and we wish him extremely well in Orlando, but we made this move to: drop some salary ourselves this season and more importantly because we believe the efficient scoring and athleticism of Keith Van Horn makes us a more dangerous team in the playoffs. Keith’s length, speed, and scoring prowess play very well at the 3 or 4 depending on matchup. We expect him to exceed Donyell’s scoring production, while playing less minutes, and matching up better with the athletic forwards around the league.

Moves 3-8 (or so):Signing some aging veterans to minimum deals for a shot at a ring. This one is somewhat self-explanatory. We needed some depth across the roster, and with our cap situation we were limited to only min bids in Free Agency. During the first round we targeted veterans who had performed well in their past, could remain efficient in limited minutes, and possessed championship caliber intangibles.

To conclude, we feel like this team is the best in the NBA, and we can’t wait for another crack at the playoffs. We also are focused in running out our core night-in and night-out to challenge from a division title - a banner that has eluded us during our tenure. At this time, I’ll be available for questions as will our entire team. And don’t forget - show your ticket stub from this press conference at any of our Papa John’s locations, and receive a free order of Breadsticks with any purchase of a Large 1-topping Pizza.

Peyton - got anything to add?
Peyton Manning wrote:Image
Not until I have me a cold budweiser...
Dwyane Wade wrote:Image
Frye that guy, what y'all got?

Re: ESPN Breaking News - Press Conference Pending from Denve

Posted: Sun Feb 21, 2016 9:42 pm
by Xist2Inspire
Random Reporter: With the acquisitions of big-money vets like Van Horn and Billups, as well as the massive incoming tax bill thanks to Wade's RFA status, is it safe to say that this is a "win big or else" season?

Re: ESPN Breaking News - Press Conference Pending from Denve

Posted: Sun Feb 21, 2016 9:45 pm
by TheSyndicate
Xist2Inspire wrote:Random Reporter: With the acquisitions of big-money vets like Van Horn and Billups, as well as the massive incoming tax bill thanks to Wade's RFA status, is it safe to say that this is a "win big or else" season?
Papa:

Sure, but the 'or else' could be variable from 'or else we'll try again' to 'or else we'll trade major assets for future cheaper assets'.

Re: ESPN Breaking News - Press Conference Pending from Denve

Posted: Sun Feb 21, 2016 10:54 pm
by kucoach7
How far are you willing to go to dump Walker? That $4 million in dead weight will really hurt this year.

Re: ESPN Breaking News - Press Conference Pending from Denve

Posted: Sun Feb 21, 2016 10:59 pm
by TheSyndicate
kucoach7 wrote:How far are you willing to go to dump Walker? That $4 million in dead weight will really hurt this year.
Papa:
Antoine Walker is like double pepperoni, sure it costs a little more, and is a luxury. But given the choice, would you really go another way? He's going to provide, scoring, veteran leadership, and a good presence inside off the bench. He's well worth the $4m and we've budgeted for the tax this year.

Re: ESPN Breaking News - Press Conference Pending from Denve

Posted: Mon Feb 22, 2016 12:18 am
by WigNosy
Do you think you have enough to take down the Kings?

Re: ESPN Breaking News - Press Conference Pending from Denve

Posted: Mon Feb 22, 2016 12:20 am
by TheSyndicate
WigNosy wrote:Do you think you have enough to take down the Kings?
The Kings are tough, no doubt. But we played them tough last year, we only got better. So we feel like we have a chance. Which is more than the other 27 teams can muster, methinks.

Re: ESPN Breaking News - Press Conference Pending from Denve

Posted: Mon Feb 22, 2016 12:56 pm
by TheSyndicate
Can't believe I have to bump my own presser. But here you go:

tl;dr - The Syndicate is Papa Johns, we're trying to win while looking to the future and being responsible with the tax man.

Re: ESPN Breaking News - Press Conference Pending from Denve

Posted: Mon Feb 22, 2016 12:59 pm
by IamQuailman
Some say the Bucks-Nuggets trade was the fairest, most equally-beneficial trade in SLOE history. Thoughts?

Re: ESPN Breaking News - Press Conference Pending from Denve

Posted: Mon Feb 22, 2016 1:12 pm
by TheSyndicate
IamQuailman wrote:Some say the Bucks-Nuggets trade was the fairest, most equally-beneficial trade in SLOE history. Thoughts?
Papa: the fairest most equally beneficial trade, is Papa's new FAMILY deal. By any 2 large pizzas, and get breadsticks and a 2-liter for free!

But aside from that, we shall see. Trades are so often judged for their current 'fair'ness. We won't know until the history books decide.

Re: ESPN Breaking News - Press Conference Pending from Denve

Posted: Mon Feb 22, 2016 1:24 pm
by JNR
TheSyndicate wrote:Can't believe I have to bump my own presser. But here you go:

tl;dr - The Syndicate is Papa Johns, we're trying to win while looking to the future and being responsible with the tax man.
Please clap.