#SLOE: People's Basketball Sim League

".......Why are we in a graveyard?"

Xist turned towards the shivering reporter and shrugged. "I figured it was a good place to hold our interview. Dark, foreboding, oddly nostalgic, devoid of life or hope...an ideal spot, no?"

The reporter grumbled as he trudged back towards the camera crew to see if they were ready. He'd previously thought that this interview with one of DC's most famous, popular, and eccentric figures would springboard his career at ESPN. Perhaps it would indeed, but a trek through a cemetery, at night, just as the biting autumn wind was coming in was not - in any way - his idea of "a ideal spot." Apparently, Xist was even more "eccentric" than the rumors stated... After getting a hearty thumbs-up from his crew - the bastards were all from places like Minnesota, Vermont, Manitoba, and the like...they weren't cold at all - he trudged back towards Xist, who was staring vacantly at the night sky. "Are you ready?"

"Yes. You don't seem to be though."

"I'm ready to get this over with and get some hot coffee, so let's just go." Xist shrugged again as the reporter signaled to his cameraman to start shooting. "This is Jay Felders, and I'm here with Wizards GM Xist2inspire. Xist, first off I'd like to ask about your thoughts on last season." A confused look flashed across Xist's face as he spoke.

"Last season? Something notable happened?"

"Um...yeah? You guys tore through the league, and ended up with the league's best record with 63 wins, by far the most since you took over the team," a slightly confused Jay replied.

"So?"

"Well, that qualifies as notable to me, and to a lot of the people in this city...fans of your team, might I add..."

"Goodie for you and the fans, but I don't see anything worth remembering about last season. We didn't do anything."

"Well of course your team suffered a disappointing Game 7 loss to the eventual champion Sixers in Round 2, but..." Jay stopped as Xist held up his hand.

"And there you have it. What good are cheering fans throughout the season if their last memory is of silence? Not a single person will remember a single one of those 63 wins as little as a year from now, yet they will all remember the 2004-05 NBA Champions. History is not written by the losers. Nothing notable happened last season. Next question."

Sheesh, this guy is a real downer, thought Jay as he moved to his next question. "All right then, moving on to more recent matters, what are your thoughts on the offseason?

"First off, let me say that everybody, including Shaq and Anthony themselves, knew that 04-05 would be their last season as Wizards. It would cost an unprecedented amount of money to keep them, and there was little reason to pay so much for two aging players when the rest of the team was in their mid-20s. Thus the decision was made to move forward with our young core. As parts of that core, Troy and Vlad knew that we planned to bring them back this season, and once they received offers that were in line with what we hoped for, the decision to match was made even easier. Going on to Training Camp, I've received word that aside from Rashard Lewis, our entire roster has made incremental gains at best, shocking drop-offs in on-court skill at worst. So my thoughts on this offseason are that it was a complete and utter failure, and I'm very disappointed that the majority of our players took last season's ending as the end, rather than a starting point for a new beginning."

"So in the face of so much turmoil, how do you plan to move forward?"

Xist stood there for awhile, and glanced over at an unmarked grave before answering. "I don't know. I remember being asked last season if I sometimes felt like the bridesmaid, never to once be the bride. I said 'not yet' then, and truthfully, I still don't feel that way. Personally, this unmarked grave is a far more apt metaphor than the 'bridesmaid' one. A lifetime's worth of unique triumphs and failures, lost to time with nothing to honor its' passing. At the very least, I know that changes must be made. Generic and unspecific, I know, but as the various options are still forming in my head, it's the best answer."

"Ooooookay...." So much for climbing up the corporate ladder... "...As you know, social media is quickly turning into the next big thing, and so we selected a few MySpace posts beforehand to present to you as additional questions right now. So, to kick things off we have..."

How much hope do you hold out that Odom and Radmanovic can recapture the fire they showed last season and get this team back to the top of the Atlantic?

What moves, if any, do you see the Wizards making to try to repeat as Atlantic champs?

"Odom's been a notoriously up-and-down talent, so there's a shred of hope there. However, we were counting on him to play an important role going forward, and now we're having serious reservations about if he can indeed perform that role. We're less optimistic about Vladimir. Since he seemed to be coming into his own last season, a setback now would logically cement him as the role player he's been his entire short career. And as for winning the Atlantic again this season...there's no reason for false hope here. That's no longer a primary concern. We need to get our own house in order first. That means none of this self-imposed pressure. Our division banners mean nothing to us now, if they ever really did. So if you're expecting something big, you'll be waiting for a while. Besides, our current cap situation doesn't give us much maneuverability."

Generic Wolves Reporter: With the tax rearing its head and your team taking a step back talent wise, are you looking to move players to try and move under the salary cap?

In the past, you've shown the ability to maneuver cap, acquire "now" assets at the expense of future assets, and retool a franchise just when it needs retooling. Do you see any opportunities there? Or is it possible that this could turn into a slow overhaul?

"Moving under the cap would take a lot of work and would be a big step. We're not quite sure about trying to go that far, but as three-time lux tax payers this season, we do want to keep our bill as low as possible. As far as retooling goes, unfortunately RFA rules makes things hard for us tradewise, thus any big "retooling" moves, if any are made, will probably have to wait until next season. Because of that, this probably will be a slow process. But with Rashard entering his prime, we can't afford to drag things out too long."

Nick Melon; Charlotte Observer: Should we expect Paul Bearer and the Undertaker to roll out caskets for the TC casualties? You still have a vastly talented team and depth at all positions, do you still see yourself in the crosshairs of the Magic and 76ers and Bucks towards the top of the East or do you think you'll look to maybe lower the tax burden and stear in another draft like direction?

"Taker hasn't retired yet? They really should be looking for more new guys who can pull off 'dark' gimmicks, like Kevin Thorn...And no, we don't see ourselves as contenders this season. As for the draft, our scouts laughed at us when we asked them about upcoming prospects in '06, so I'm taking that as a bad sign. Given that we can't really lower the tax as much as we'd like to this season, it's pretty safe to say that Lamar, Vlad, and Murphy will be playing for their jobs this season. That, as well as 2007's draft class, will determine whether or not we choose to shed salary and jump back into the drafting game."

Do you believe that you missed an opportunity last year?

"Absolutely. Everyone in our organization knew that this just might be their best chance at a title, and everyone in our organization blew it, the Sixers' "hot hand" be damned. I don't think we'll ever get another chance as good as that again, and by 'we,' I mean 'this group', because I plan to be here long after they've all retired. Speaking of retirement, there's a good chance that every single player on that roster could retire without a ring. I just hope the ones still on our roster today realize that and work to prove me wrong."

You've stated in your last answer that rebuilding through the 06 draft isn't a viable option. Will the Wiz be in a limbo for a few seasons? Will the Wiz attempt a major reset with Lewis?

Sent via Morse code

"We're definitely in the the Twilight Zone for this season, no use denying it. We don't intend to spend another season beyond that in a confused state, however. By this time next season, our direction will be clear, whether that be rebuilding through the draft and with cap space, or retooling through impact trades. Our scouts are already looking into future draft prospects to see if rebuilding truly is a viable option. As for Rashard, he's pretty much the only player who has shown any kind of heart and drive throughout all this, meaning his spot here is secured. We'd love to pull off a Kings-type renaissance built around Rashard, but again, it won't be until next season when we can see if that's possible."

Dr. Rocker, The Cleveland Rocker: Cleveland ownership has been openly denigrated for measuring success by titles, but you seem to be agreeing exactly with this. Your picks are intact, you have some movable contracts, and you guys that can play. Is there no middle course between winning a title and maximizing your draft assets?

"Oh, there's certainly a middle ground - there always is. I'm just getting pretty damn tired of standing in it. There's no shame in competing year after year - but that's not what's been happening here. We're a treadmill team. Scraping, scheming, planning, building, all for the sake of continued second-round dismissals. That's the kind of middle ground we're in, and that's the kind of middle ground I'm not willing to maintain much longer."