Bullets Don't Care About Your Feelings
Posted: Mon May 25, 2026 2:02 am
Hello and Welcome Back for another season of exchanging Bullets.
Plenty to flesh out from the offseason, and we all know activity will continue right up to the deadline, but I want to start with ideology. Maybe give a little insight into our thought process as an organization, which will make more sense out of how we are moving.
Last season we were forced to convince ourselves of what we already knew. In order to understand that we'll have to go back a little further. We made the deal to get Magic because we believe that at this point you can not win a title without: 1) a top 3 player in the league surrounded by a strong supporting cast, or 2) a collection of top 10 or top 15 players that is deep enough to overpower the greater player as a team.
The finals is a good example of that where you see Rivers, Hornacek, Barkley, and Wilkins knocking off Jordan, Mullin, Thomas, Chambers, and West. We have teams that serve as such superpowers that you can't beat them on the edges. You need power to match power. So we made a deal for THE Player who had up to that point been absolutely dominant in this league as an individual.
We really thought we would be able to flip him for a greater package than we sent out, but did not see that happen. Instead we watched a short-handed cast take a big step forward to close out the season which gave us mixed feelings.
We did not want to chalk up Magic as a complete loss, and we weren't seeing the return we wanted, so we were forced to compete and surround him with the best supporting cast we could. We felt like the support we got him was ample before we even hit UFA, and he turned around and spit in our faces. After our lawyers had to locate his contractual clause and drag him in with a re-sim, he took a big dive on us in camp. That asshole mailed it in from the very beginning, and we knew we had a problem on our hands.
At the end of the day we put up 57 wins and got bounced in the 2nd round. We saw it coming for 8 sims. There were NO Moral Victories! The end was just a chain of formalities that led us towards today.
In the offseason we got active early. First order was to get rid of that cancerous sack of HIV infested feces as quickly as possible. We got 2 birds when we were able to acquire our 91 pick back from the Spurs, and he's their problem now. You see by the immediate impact, not only is he continuing to decline, but he infected Jordan as well, but that's not our business. From that exchange, our business became Sean Elliot, who we LOVE, and Tim Legler, who I already cut.
We followed that move with a game changer that officially reset our roster. We had to send out Sleepy Floyd, who will have a tribute celebration every time he returns to our arena, and were happy to ship Byron Scott who was brought in to support Magic, but quickly followed suit by consistently underperforming. Together they got us the #3 pick which we were going to use on Tim Hardaway until we were offered a great package to move back 2 spots. We jumped at the opportunity to bring back Ken Norman along with the picks that became Tim Hardaway and Pervis Ellison. We liked Tim Hardaway A Lot, but couldn't pass on the return we ended up with for him. So he ended in Minnesota, and we're starting our season with Rod Strickland and Cadillac Anderson coming off our bench.
Next it was time to catch some side eyes and all the HATE from disgruntled GMs who weren't expecting us to cannon ball on free agency like we did. Going back to basic philosophy and General Principle, that's how you're supposed to operate if you have cap space in free agency! Just because we have no intention of competing for the ship this season, we weren't going to sit by and watch the contenders sign the best players to sweetheart deals that would position them well in the future.
With the exception of Kelly Tripucka, we resigned all of our own free agents to reasonable contracts, and then we moved them to teams that can use them.
The bigger story is probably the guys we brought in from all over the league. We first signed Charles Oakley and Michael Adams in RFA, but they were unceremoniously matched. Then we landed some bright futures in Spud Webb and Xavier McDaniel. They might stick with us, or they might have a cup of coffee, but they both have something to prove to this league. Finally we claimed Eric Leckner after his stellar camp, and John Battle who fits our culture well.
Long story - even longer, we're going to flip talent until we land generational talent. If you want some of what we're selling come with cash in hand and Her-Up. We don't want to hear about the deal we should have made after the deal we made. We shittin round here, not sittin on the pot.
Who needs clarification?
Oh Yeah,
Starting line-up is:
Wallace Bryant
Peter Verhoeven
Xavier McDaniel
Ricky Pierce
Spud Webb
First Question?
Plenty to flesh out from the offseason, and we all know activity will continue right up to the deadline, but I want to start with ideology. Maybe give a little insight into our thought process as an organization, which will make more sense out of how we are moving.
Last season we were forced to convince ourselves of what we already knew. In order to understand that we'll have to go back a little further. We made the deal to get Magic because we believe that at this point you can not win a title without: 1) a top 3 player in the league surrounded by a strong supporting cast, or 2) a collection of top 10 or top 15 players that is deep enough to overpower the greater player as a team.
The finals is a good example of that where you see Rivers, Hornacek, Barkley, and Wilkins knocking off Jordan, Mullin, Thomas, Chambers, and West. We have teams that serve as such superpowers that you can't beat them on the edges. You need power to match power. So we made a deal for THE Player who had up to that point been absolutely dominant in this league as an individual.
We really thought we would be able to flip him for a greater package than we sent out, but did not see that happen. Instead we watched a short-handed cast take a big step forward to close out the season which gave us mixed feelings.
We did not want to chalk up Magic as a complete loss, and we weren't seeing the return we wanted, so we were forced to compete and surround him with the best supporting cast we could. We felt like the support we got him was ample before we even hit UFA, and he turned around and spit in our faces. After our lawyers had to locate his contractual clause and drag him in with a re-sim, he took a big dive on us in camp. That asshole mailed it in from the very beginning, and we knew we had a problem on our hands.
At the end of the day we put up 57 wins and got bounced in the 2nd round. We saw it coming for 8 sims. There were NO Moral Victories! The end was just a chain of formalities that led us towards today.
In the offseason we got active early. First order was to get rid of that cancerous sack of HIV infested feces as quickly as possible. We got 2 birds when we were able to acquire our 91 pick back from the Spurs, and he's their problem now. You see by the immediate impact, not only is he continuing to decline, but he infected Jordan as well, but that's not our business. From that exchange, our business became Sean Elliot, who we LOVE, and Tim Legler, who I already cut.
We followed that move with a game changer that officially reset our roster. We had to send out Sleepy Floyd, who will have a tribute celebration every time he returns to our arena, and were happy to ship Byron Scott who was brought in to support Magic, but quickly followed suit by consistently underperforming. Together they got us the #3 pick which we were going to use on Tim Hardaway until we were offered a great package to move back 2 spots. We jumped at the opportunity to bring back Ken Norman along with the picks that became Tim Hardaway and Pervis Ellison. We liked Tim Hardaway A Lot, but couldn't pass on the return we ended up with for him. So he ended in Minnesota, and we're starting our season with Rod Strickland and Cadillac Anderson coming off our bench.
Next it was time to catch some side eyes and all the HATE from disgruntled GMs who weren't expecting us to cannon ball on free agency like we did. Going back to basic philosophy and General Principle, that's how you're supposed to operate if you have cap space in free agency! Just because we have no intention of competing for the ship this season, we weren't going to sit by and watch the contenders sign the best players to sweetheart deals that would position them well in the future.
With the exception of Kelly Tripucka, we resigned all of our own free agents to reasonable contracts, and then we moved them to teams that can use them.
The bigger story is probably the guys we brought in from all over the league. We first signed Charles Oakley and Michael Adams in RFA, but they were unceremoniously matched. Then we landed some bright futures in Spud Webb and Xavier McDaniel. They might stick with us, or they might have a cup of coffee, but they both have something to prove to this league. Finally we claimed Eric Leckner after his stellar camp, and John Battle who fits our culture well.
Long story - even longer, we're going to flip talent until we land generational talent. If you want some of what we're selling come with cash in hand and Her-Up. We don't want to hear about the deal we should have made after the deal we made. We shittin round here, not sittin on the pot.
Who needs clarification?
Oh Yeah,
Starting line-up is:
Wallace Bryant
Peter Verhoeven
Xavier McDaniel
Ricky Pierce
Spud Webb
First Question?