85'-86' Kansas City Kings Pre-Season Presser
Posted: Sun Sep 28, 2025 5:07 pm
1985–86 Kansas City Kings Preseason Presser
Ladies and gentlemen, members of the press, fans of the New Peoples Sim Basketball League, and anyone else tuning in — welcome. It’s that time again, the start of another NPBSL season. The lights are on, the cameras are rolling, and the Kansas City Kings are ready to make noise — though perhaps in a very different way than you’re used to.
Let me start with a little honesty, because too many front offices hide behind clichés and platitudes: last year was a good year… but it wasn’t good enough. We went 50–32, second in the Midwest Division. We made a playoff run, taking out the Sonics in seven grueling games, and then went toe-to-toe with the eventual champion Trailblazers, pushing them all the way to seven before bowing out. That was a war, and I’ll give Portland their credit — they survived the West and they earned the trophy. But here’s the truth: in this league, almost good enough is still nowhere. If you’re not the team hoisting the banner, you’re just one of the 22 clubs watching someone else climb the podium.
And I don’t do “just watching.”
See, too many organizations fall into the trap of being comfortable with respectability. They hang onto aging stars, grind out 45 to 50 wins a season, put some butts in seats, and then year after year, they get bounced in the playoffs. Rinse, repeat. I looked at our roster last year and I said, “This team is fun, this team is talented, but this team isn’t winning a title.” Period. And if you’re not on the path to the trophy, then what are you doing?
We had Alex English, an offensive machine, one of the smoothest scorers this league has ever seen. We had George Gervin, the Iceman himself, still getting buckets. We had Eddie Johnson putting up 23.5 a night, Danny Ainge running point, and Alton Lister patrolling the paint as one of the best defensive bigs in the NPBSL. That’s a lot of talent. But talent doesn’t mean balance, and it doesn’t mean rings.
Look at the numbers. We were 5th in the conference in scoring at 121.1 points per game — plenty of firepower. But defensively? 18th in the league. We gave up 117.3 points a night. That’s not just bad — that’s fatal in the playoffs. In the NPBSL, defense and rebounding win titles. The Bucks and the Bullets last year? Monsters on the glass. The Blazers, who cut through the West like a buzzsaw? They rebounded like their lives depended on it. We were 9th overall. Middle of the pack. Not good enough.
So I faced the truth: this core had hit its ceiling. We could’ve run it back, maybe squeezed out another 50 wins, maybe even made the conference finals. But winning in this league isn’t about “maybe.” It’s about building something that can dominate.
The problem was, we didn’t even control our future. Our 1986 and 1987 first-round picks — gone. That’s death for a GM who wants to rebuild. You can’t tear it down without your own draft capital. So my first order of business this offseason was simple: I needed those picks back. Without them, there’s no future.
Let’s talk about George Gervin. One of the smoothest scorers to ever touch a basketball. A legend. But legends get old, and value declines fast in this league. I knew I had to cash in before the bottom dropped out. So I picked up the phone, worked the angles, and got my 1987 first-round pick back from the Spurs in exchange for Gervin, some points, and their ’86 first. They got a veteran scorer for a title run, and I was getting my future back.
Next came Alex English. Another all-time great scorer, another player with a Hall of Fame résumé. But again — you don’t win tomorrow by holding onto yesterday. The Pistons held our 1986 first, and that had to come home. I moved English, and in return, I got the ’86 pick back along with some young pieces and assets. Harsh to English? Maybe. Necessary? Absolutely.
Now, let’s pause here, because some people might’ve stopped after just getting their picks back. They might’ve said, “Okay, now we’ll just ride out the roster we’ve got, keep Ainge, keep Johnson, keep Lister, and hope for the best.” Not me. I don’t do half-measures. Once the decision to rebuild was made, it was all the way or nothing.
Danny Ainge. RFA. Here’s where the NPBSL rulebook gets interesting. I wasn’t going to give him a max deal — he’s not worth that, not on a roster that’s aiming for the future. But if I just let him walk, I’d get nothing. So I played it smart. The Jazz signed him, I held the matching rights, and instead of matching, I worked out a sign-and-trade. What did I get? Oh, just the Jazz’s 1987 and 1988 first-round picks, plus Frank Brickowski, Leon Wood, Sedale Threatt, and 15 points. That’s called maximizing value. Ainge wasn’t going to be part of our future, but his rights helped build it.
Then came the real gamble. Eddie Johnson and Alton Lister — two players who still had serious value. Here’s the catch: if I re-signed them in RFA, I couldn’t trade them for a full year. That would’ve been pointless, because my plan demanded moving them sooner rather than later. So I declined their RFA status, threw them into UFA, and bet on my leverage as the incumbent team. Only I could offer the supermax. And what do you know? It worked exactly as planned. Eddie took the 5-year supermax. Lister did too, with a team option in the 5th year, which made him even more tradeable. Risky? Sure. Brilliant? Also yes.
Alton Lister was the first to move. The Warriors came knocking, and I sent him west in exchange for Detlef Schrempf — a freshly drafted rookie with real upside — plus Edgar Jones, Mike Glenn, Bobby Jones, and points. Detlef is already showing flashes in preseason. Nineteen points, nearly six boards, nearly four assists a night in 42 minutes. He’s raw, but you can see the potential. He’s 22, 6’10”, with a sweet jumper and playmaking instincts. This is the kind of player you build around when you’re rebuilding.
Next was Eddie Johnson. Twenty-three points a night last year. Still in his prime. And I flipped him to the Nets for Joe Dumars, another rookie with massive upside, plus Larry Drew. Dumars hasn’t suited up in preseason yet, but let me tell you: I’m thrilled. He’s raw, sure. But his potential? A defender with A/A upside, a perimeter scorer, a guy who could grow into one of the premier guards in this league. Again — rookies on rookie deals, potential stars, that’s what you want when you’re starting fresh.
So, let’s recap. In the span of one offseason, I moved on from Gervin, English, Ainge, Johnson, and Lister — five of my top players from last season. And what did I get?
My 1986 and 1987 first-round picks back.
The Jazz’s 1987 and 1988 firsts.
Young talent like Detlef Schrempf and Joe Dumars.
Solid filler players to keep the roster moving.
Points to maneuver with.
That’s not just a rebuild. That’s a masterclass in asset management.
Now, some of you will ask — “But Darth Vegito, doesn’t this mean you’re going to be bad this year?” To which I say — yes. That’s the point. We’re not chasing the 8-seed. We’re not here to get bounced in the first round for the next five years. We’re here to build something sustainable, something that dominates. And that means taking the hit now, so we can climb higher later.
But don’t think for a second that this season will be boring. You’re going to see Detlef Schrempf grow before your eyes. You’re going to watch Joe Dumars cut his teeth against the best guards in the league. You’re going to see a team that plays hard, competes, and learns — even if the scoreboard doesn’t always go our way. And while we’re doing that, we’ll be stacking draft picks and preparing for the future.
Let me be clear: the Kansas City Kings aren’t just rebuilding. We’re reloading. This is a controlled demolition, and when the dust settles, we’ll have the foundation of a dynasty.
Some GMs are afraid to pull the trigger. They’re afraid of the headlines, afraid of the fan backlash, afraid of losing 50 games in a season. I’m not afraid. I’d rather take the pain now and win later than keep you stuck in basketball purgatory forever.
And I’ll admit, I’m a little cocky about it. Because while some teams are clinging to stars who are about to decline, or trading future firsts like candy, I’ve set us up to have one of the brightest futures in the NPBSL. Look around the league. How many teams can say they have multiple rookies with star potential and control of four upcoming first-round picks? Not many.
So to the fans, I say this: buckle in. This season might be rocky, but it’s going to be worth it. To the rest of the league, I say this: laugh now if you want, but remember this moment, because in a few years, when the Kings are on top, you’ll know exactly when it started — right here, right now.
This isn’t the end of something. It’s the beginning.
Thank you.
Ladies and gentlemen, members of the press, fans of the New Peoples Sim Basketball League, and anyone else tuning in — welcome. It’s that time again, the start of another NPBSL season. The lights are on, the cameras are rolling, and the Kansas City Kings are ready to make noise — though perhaps in a very different way than you’re used to.
Let me start with a little honesty, because too many front offices hide behind clichés and platitudes: last year was a good year… but it wasn’t good enough. We went 50–32, second in the Midwest Division. We made a playoff run, taking out the Sonics in seven grueling games, and then went toe-to-toe with the eventual champion Trailblazers, pushing them all the way to seven before bowing out. That was a war, and I’ll give Portland their credit — they survived the West and they earned the trophy. But here’s the truth: in this league, almost good enough is still nowhere. If you’re not the team hoisting the banner, you’re just one of the 22 clubs watching someone else climb the podium.
And I don’t do “just watching.”
See, too many organizations fall into the trap of being comfortable with respectability. They hang onto aging stars, grind out 45 to 50 wins a season, put some butts in seats, and then year after year, they get bounced in the playoffs. Rinse, repeat. I looked at our roster last year and I said, “This team is fun, this team is talented, but this team isn’t winning a title.” Period. And if you’re not on the path to the trophy, then what are you doing?
We had Alex English, an offensive machine, one of the smoothest scorers this league has ever seen. We had George Gervin, the Iceman himself, still getting buckets. We had Eddie Johnson putting up 23.5 a night, Danny Ainge running point, and Alton Lister patrolling the paint as one of the best defensive bigs in the NPBSL. That’s a lot of talent. But talent doesn’t mean balance, and it doesn’t mean rings.
Look at the numbers. We were 5th in the conference in scoring at 121.1 points per game — plenty of firepower. But defensively? 18th in the league. We gave up 117.3 points a night. That’s not just bad — that’s fatal in the playoffs. In the NPBSL, defense and rebounding win titles. The Bucks and the Bullets last year? Monsters on the glass. The Blazers, who cut through the West like a buzzsaw? They rebounded like their lives depended on it. We were 9th overall. Middle of the pack. Not good enough.
So I faced the truth: this core had hit its ceiling. We could’ve run it back, maybe squeezed out another 50 wins, maybe even made the conference finals. But winning in this league isn’t about “maybe.” It’s about building something that can dominate.
The problem was, we didn’t even control our future. Our 1986 and 1987 first-round picks — gone. That’s death for a GM who wants to rebuild. You can’t tear it down without your own draft capital. So my first order of business this offseason was simple: I needed those picks back. Without them, there’s no future.
Let’s talk about George Gervin. One of the smoothest scorers to ever touch a basketball. A legend. But legends get old, and value declines fast in this league. I knew I had to cash in before the bottom dropped out. So I picked up the phone, worked the angles, and got my 1987 first-round pick back from the Spurs in exchange for Gervin, some points, and their ’86 first. They got a veteran scorer for a title run, and I was getting my future back.
Next came Alex English. Another all-time great scorer, another player with a Hall of Fame résumé. But again — you don’t win tomorrow by holding onto yesterday. The Pistons held our 1986 first, and that had to come home. I moved English, and in return, I got the ’86 pick back along with some young pieces and assets. Harsh to English? Maybe. Necessary? Absolutely.
Now, let’s pause here, because some people might’ve stopped after just getting their picks back. They might’ve said, “Okay, now we’ll just ride out the roster we’ve got, keep Ainge, keep Johnson, keep Lister, and hope for the best.” Not me. I don’t do half-measures. Once the decision to rebuild was made, it was all the way or nothing.
Danny Ainge. RFA. Here’s where the NPBSL rulebook gets interesting. I wasn’t going to give him a max deal — he’s not worth that, not on a roster that’s aiming for the future. But if I just let him walk, I’d get nothing. So I played it smart. The Jazz signed him, I held the matching rights, and instead of matching, I worked out a sign-and-trade. What did I get? Oh, just the Jazz’s 1987 and 1988 first-round picks, plus Frank Brickowski, Leon Wood, Sedale Threatt, and 15 points. That’s called maximizing value. Ainge wasn’t going to be part of our future, but his rights helped build it.
Then came the real gamble. Eddie Johnson and Alton Lister — two players who still had serious value. Here’s the catch: if I re-signed them in RFA, I couldn’t trade them for a full year. That would’ve been pointless, because my plan demanded moving them sooner rather than later. So I declined their RFA status, threw them into UFA, and bet on my leverage as the incumbent team. Only I could offer the supermax. And what do you know? It worked exactly as planned. Eddie took the 5-year supermax. Lister did too, with a team option in the 5th year, which made him even more tradeable. Risky? Sure. Brilliant? Also yes.
Alton Lister was the first to move. The Warriors came knocking, and I sent him west in exchange for Detlef Schrempf — a freshly drafted rookie with real upside — plus Edgar Jones, Mike Glenn, Bobby Jones, and points. Detlef is already showing flashes in preseason. Nineteen points, nearly six boards, nearly four assists a night in 42 minutes. He’s raw, but you can see the potential. He’s 22, 6’10”, with a sweet jumper and playmaking instincts. This is the kind of player you build around when you’re rebuilding.
Next was Eddie Johnson. Twenty-three points a night last year. Still in his prime. And I flipped him to the Nets for Joe Dumars, another rookie with massive upside, plus Larry Drew. Dumars hasn’t suited up in preseason yet, but let me tell you: I’m thrilled. He’s raw, sure. But his potential? A defender with A/A upside, a perimeter scorer, a guy who could grow into one of the premier guards in this league. Again — rookies on rookie deals, potential stars, that’s what you want when you’re starting fresh.
So, let’s recap. In the span of one offseason, I moved on from Gervin, English, Ainge, Johnson, and Lister — five of my top players from last season. And what did I get?
My 1986 and 1987 first-round picks back.
The Jazz’s 1987 and 1988 firsts.
Young talent like Detlef Schrempf and Joe Dumars.
Solid filler players to keep the roster moving.
Points to maneuver with.
That’s not just a rebuild. That’s a masterclass in asset management.
Now, some of you will ask — “But Darth Vegito, doesn’t this mean you’re going to be bad this year?” To which I say — yes. That’s the point. We’re not chasing the 8-seed. We’re not here to get bounced in the first round for the next five years. We’re here to build something sustainable, something that dominates. And that means taking the hit now, so we can climb higher later.
But don’t think for a second that this season will be boring. You’re going to see Detlef Schrempf grow before your eyes. You’re going to watch Joe Dumars cut his teeth against the best guards in the league. You’re going to see a team that plays hard, competes, and learns — even if the scoreboard doesn’t always go our way. And while we’re doing that, we’ll be stacking draft picks and preparing for the future.
Let me be clear: the Kansas City Kings aren’t just rebuilding. We’re reloading. This is a controlled demolition, and when the dust settles, we’ll have the foundation of a dynasty.
Some GMs are afraid to pull the trigger. They’re afraid of the headlines, afraid of the fan backlash, afraid of losing 50 games in a season. I’m not afraid. I’d rather take the pain now and win later than keep you stuck in basketball purgatory forever.
And I’ll admit, I’m a little cocky about it. Because while some teams are clinging to stars who are about to decline, or trading future firsts like candy, I’ve set us up to have one of the brightest futures in the NPBSL. Look around the league. How many teams can say they have multiple rookies with star potential and control of four upcoming first-round picks? Not many.
So to the fans, I say this: buckle in. This season might be rocky, but it’s going to be worth it. To the rest of the league, I say this: laugh now if you want, but remember this moment, because in a few years, when the Kings are on top, you’ll know exactly when it started — right here, right now.
This isn’t the end of something. It’s the beginning.
Thank you.