#SLOE: People's Basketball Sim League

GM Ian Quailmen: HALLO EVERYONE! Welcome to another happy time Bucks talk session. As you can see, I'm very excited to be here with you today, and that's NOT because of the 3 Red Bulls I pounded prior to getting up on the podium to talk to you all. So let's recap! Last season we blew it all up. Brought in Manu Ginobili, Zach Randolph, Rafer Alston and Jamaal Magloire and shipped out proven veterans in Jalen Rose, Shaquille O'Neal, Bobby Jackson, and Eric Piatkowski. Last year, on the court, not many fond memories. We know. We'll best be known for the 27-game losing streak we had. Some called us tankers, but we had many players on our team that did not fit our future plans, and we shipped them out for cash considerations and picks. We literally had young players still learning the game and aging vets on our squad. No one could really score points either. Anyway, like I said, last season was not very memorable.... FAST FORWARD TO...
GM Ian Quailmen: We struck gold in the lotto, winning the #1 overall pick in the draft. And we were faced with a difficult decision of Yao Ming and Amar'e Stoudemire. When the Knicks (#2 pick) approached us with the offer of #2 overall and Cavs 03 1st for #1 so they could grab their coveted Yao Ming, we couldn't resist that. The Knicks made our decision easy. And we are completely thrilled to have Amar'e in Milwaukee, despite how awkward he looked shaking the commissioner's hand.
GM Ian Quailmen: Then the questions immediately arose. "What about Zbo? What are you going to do with him?" We had plans. Part of the plan was to play Amar'e at the 5. We would figure it out. But then, we reached out to the Hornets about the long-coveted Ron Artest. We had loved him since the day he was drafted, and have tried tirelessly over the past few seasons. Throughout the talks last year, discussions with the Hornets said that Z-Bo or Manu would need to be involved for them to even consider moving Artest. And well... Z-bo had become slightly available for talks. So we engaged in talks, using the ammunition provided from that #1-to-#2 trade back as part of the deal to lubricate the talks and process. In order to take on Artest, we had to take on David Wesley's expiring contract, and we are happy to have a wily vet on our relatively young squad. Most importantly, we are thrilled to have Ron on our team to cement our wing positions next to Manu Ginobili who continues to progress into the great guard we believe he'll become. During RFA, we brought back Rafer on a team-friendly deal, and are thrilled to have him here to learn from a great player like David Wesley. Lastly, one of our more underrated moves of the offseason, in my opinion, was using the Grizzlies 03 1st to get our own 03 1st, Stacey Augmon, rookie forward Darius Songaila, and cash considerations. Controlling our own destiny is important, and having our own pick as insurance in the event of not making the playoffs will be huge for us. But being able to grab cash AND Darius Songaila definitely makes it even more worth it.

GM Quailmen: We recently conducted training camp, and all of our young players showed up in top form. We feel really good about our teams direction, and look forward to watching them learn how to play with one another this season. It's going to be a great one!

GM: Now I'd like to open the floor to any questions you may have... go ahead!

How bloody is your penis?

Sent via Morse code

GWR: What's your goal here? You seem to be stuck in the Britney Spears category where your team is not a girl, not yet a woman. In what direction are you taking this team?

Random Reporter: With both Artest and Ginobili having great camps, where does last-second FA signing Michael Dickerson fit in?

Much has been made of Ron Artest's arrival, yet to my eyes, he's not ready to carry a team offensively. Who will be asked to shoulder being "the man" on offense this year?

Are the rumors true that you you no longer need your prescription for viagra since the arrival of Amar'e Stoudemire and Ron Artest to the Bucks?

NOLa. wrote:How bloody is your penis?

Sent via Morse code

What blood?

JNR wrote:GWR: What's your goal here? You seem to be stuck in the Britney Spears category where your team is not a girl, not yet a woman. In what direction are you taking this team?

QM Quailmen: Thanks for the question. While we do love some Britney Spears, we like to think we are a late teens version of a female. We are starting to grow boobies and wear short skirts, but we are a little prudish about putting out.... but maybe we'll dabble in some alcohol and start dating jocks and become a woman soon enough. Wait what are we talking about again? Also, if you seek Amy, you will get stronger.

IamQuailman wrote:

NOLa. wrote:How bloody is your penis?

Sent via Morse code

What blood?

Cute

Sent via Morse code

Xist2Inspire wrote:Random Reporter: With both Artest and Ginobili having great camps, where does last-second FA signing Michael Dickerson fit in?

GM Quailmen: Our plans for Michael were to provide some depth on the wing. However, if he has a problem with his role, then we wil cross that road when we get there. Having him on a team friendly contract (2yr, 4mil per, team option), we are flexible in what aspect he will help this team.

WigNosy wrote:Much has been made of Ron Artest's arrival, yet to my eyes, he's not ready to carry a team offensively. Who will be asked to shoulder being "the man" on offense this year?

Ron has definitely progressed further than we anticipated, but we fully expect that Wesley and Manu will at least shoulder some of the load, along with Amar'e. It will definitely be a team effort.

Are playoffs the goal for this season?

ANSWER THE DAMN QUESTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Will this team be able to compete before all those young contracts come due?

RPF wrote:Are the rumors true that you you no longer need your prescription for viagra since the arrival of Amar'e Stoudemire and Ron Artest to the Bucks?

I don't need Viagra... i'm the same size soft and hard.

PrepP wrote:Are playoffs the goal for this season?

The goal for the season is improvement, with playoffs being a consolation prize.

Soundwave wrote:Will this team be able to compete before all those young contracts come due?

We have Manu and Artest both coming off their rookie deals after this season, but after that we have a nice set of reasonable contracts to ride out the duration of their next deals. When the time comes, I'll work my number crunching magic

Awarded 5 pts!