#SLOE: People's Basketball Sim League

Smoke fills the media room as someone installed smoke machines at every corner and two on the ceiling. The media members cough and wave their hands in an attempt to push the smoke away, but it is all encompassing. Soon, though, it dissipates enough for everyone to see a little bit. And what they see is The JNR, the returning GM of the Wolves. He's wearing a cape. Let's not ask why.

The JNR: Good morning friends and fans! I have returned after a few seasons away. I know the first question will be why did I come back, so I will ask it myself so that none of you can get an easy question at my expense. Hey, The JNR, why did you come back?

He smiles.

The JNR: That's a great question. I came back for the same reason I left. Which is...I dunno. I was bored of this, running the same team for almost 60 years...how old am I? Am I immortal? Anyway. It took so much effort to keep this up, effort I didn't think I had. But I watched from afar. I watched as Lenz and Xue got better. I watched as no one took over. I watched as the potential bloomed and blossomed. And I thought last year towards the end of the year when the playoffs were in sight, "I can help."

And so I did. I stepped in, made some adjustments, and we made the playoffs. We won one game off the Jazz, which was honestly better than I expected. And then I kept thinking, "wait til next year." I got excited thinking about what happened next. So what did happen next?

Well, not that much good, to be honest. I signed Robert Sandoval to what most would consider an overpay, and then I signed a lot of fringe players. We kept Xue, of course. And we drafted a player who immediately crashed in training camp. For the most part training camp was bad, but the best players on the team still look good. Going into the season, I am thinking of the following starting lineup:

C: David Moore
PF: Robert Sandoval
SF: Xue Huo
SG: Lenz Durrenberger
PG: Gary Millard

With Ross Finch and Daniel Jauregui making contributions off the bench. I expect us to be better than the team was without my intervention, but I am still getting used to the swing of things, so my expectations are not high.

I'm happy to be back, gentlemen. So, any questions?

Welcome back to the league. Now that Xue has the best ceiling for any player in the league what are your expectations for your team this season?

The JNR: Thanks for the question. Honestly looking at the rest of the league, the talent is insane. Most of the best teams have so much more talent than we do. The Nets and the Celtics in our division seem to be more talented generally, so I think competing with them will be the priority. I hope to be a competitive team and fight for the playoffs.

Sham Smith, Bulls.com: Is there anything that stepping away from the game for a few seasons has changed your perspective on in terms of GM strategy?

Do you see yourself resurrecting any of your old extracurriculars this go round in sim league like the Hall of Fame or the Horns & Fangs podcast? Or is full-time Wolves GM satisfying enough?

garbageman wrote: Fri Mar 10, 2023 10:03 am Sham Smith, Bulls.com: Is there anything that stepping away from the game for a few seasons has changed your perspective on in terms of GM strategy?

The JNR: Nothing different in terms of strategy, I'd say. The thing that has really changed is my attitude towards it. I'm going to try to run my team like I always have.

K-100 wrote: Fri Mar 10, 2023 10:04 am Do you see yourself resurrecting any of your old extracurriculars this go round in sim league like the Hall of Fame or the Horns & Fangs podcast? Or is full-time Wolves GM satisfying enough?

Horns and Fangs yes, Hall of Fame probably not. But I do have a few article ideas kicking around here or there.

Xue is obviously going to be a superstar and The Big German is a strong #2. After that though you have a few interesting younger pieces still looking to grow and develop. Who is it that you think is best suited to turn into the #3 guy?

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MexicanMamba wrote: Fri Mar 10, 2023 12:42 pm Xue is obviously going to be a superstar and The Big German is a strong #2. After that though you have a few interesting younger pieces still looking to grow and develop. Who is it that you think is best suited to turn into the #3 guy?

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I'm not sure if he's on the roster. Sandoval and Ford are good pieces, but we'll have to see how the fit is with both. Ford is a little behind on the timeline, and while Sandoval may be closer to Lenz's age, he seems more complementary.

Chet Youbetcha, Dimmadome News: how does it feel to be added to the list of Timberwolves leaders that have been hired multiple times, such as Flip Saunders and Kevin McHale?


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The JNR: Those people never ran the Wolves. I’ve run the Wolves from 1990 to 2050.

Random Reporter: What really gets you excited about this team? What are you most looking forward to seeing?

Xist2Inspire wrote: Sat Mar 11, 2023 2:21 pm Random Reporter: What really gets you excited about this team? What are you most looking forward to seeing?

The JNR: I won’t get cute here. It’s Xue. He’s one of the most exciting young players in the league. He can be a franchise cornerstone.

Two questions: It's hard not to notice that, in the real world, we are in the '22-'23 season, and in sim world, your banner hangs as the '22-'23 champs. Coincidence? Did you return because on the strength of Xueperman you can achieve gold before (real) 2023 is over?

How many offers has Doug made for Xue since you came back?

What did you do or say to your guys to win that last game of the season by 3 points, beat my team (the Mavericks), and take that final playoff spot from me?

What was the game plan? Full-court press, zone defense, encouragement, throwing chairs, or just good old fashion HGH and steroids.

You went 4-1 against my team last season. I'd have made the playoffs if I had won just one of those games. What's your secret?

greepleairport wrote: Sun Mar 12, 2023 3:29 pm Two questions: It's hard not to notice that, in the real world, we are in the '22-'23 season, and in sim world, your banner hangs as the '22-'23 champs. Coincidence? Did you return because on the strength of Xueperman you can achieve gold before (real) 2023 is over?

How many offers has Doug made for Xue since you came back?

The JNR: That'd be wild. If I believed in multiverses I'd think it's a sign.

And none seriously. He knows he can't get him yet.

LazyTitanSmash wrote: Mon Mar 13, 2023 12:32 am What did you do or say to your guys to win that last game of the season by 3 points, beat my team (the Mavericks), and take that final playoff spot from me?

What was the game plan? Full-court press, zone defense, encouragement, throwing chairs, or just good old fashion HGH and steroids.

You went 4-1 against my team last season. I'd have made the playoffs if I had won just one of those games. What's your secret?

The JNR: I think it was silent motivation. I came in, made some gameplan changes to account for defense and pace, and just sent them out there. I have always fancied myself more of a steadying presence than a gameplanning mastermind, so that's what I think the guys needed.

Sorry the win came at your expense.