Nicholas Zike: Lost & Found?
It was a cold, dreary day in Joppa, Maryland, when 15-year old Nicholas Zike decided to ride his bike to the local convenient store to buy cigarettes. Despite the harsh weather, Nick was desperate for a smoke, and as a result wouldn't mind getting himself a little wet if it meant he could suck on a stick. But before he could venture to the store, he had some work to finish up.
"Now that you're done cleaning your room, I want you to do the damn dishes," his mother ordered him.
"Fvck you!" he stammered as he stormed out the house, grabbing his bike at the end of the driveway. His mother, stunned, could only look on in disbelief as he mounted his bike. As he peddled off into the sunset, he could see his mother watching him over his shoulder; and in one last act of defiance, he gave her the middle finger. At this point, he wasn't sure what was racing faster: Him, or his heart rate. But it was too late to think about that—all he could think of doing now was getting away. And that's exactly what he did.
After an hour of angry pedaling, Nick's vision began to blur, causing him to crash into a nearby stop sign. As he laid in the grass, he could feel the hands of multiple homeless people going through his pockets, but was unable to fight them off. When he awoke hours later, it was nighttime and he was alone: Just he, himself, and him. Looking up at the sky, Nick saw what he thought was a star—but then, suddenly, it raced across the night sky so quickly that it gave him the spins.
"Huh?" he uttered as he watched the so-called star defy the laws of physics.
And then, suddenly, there was nothing: A lapse of time. The next thing he knew, he was cold, sweaty, and lying on an operating table. Where am I? he wondered as he opened his eyes, which were just as blurry as they were before. As his eyesight began to sharpen, his heart raced as he came to the realization that he wasn't in a hospital. He wasn't sure where he was, but he knew he was unfamiliar with everything surrounding him. Looking frantically around the room, Nick saw bizarre surgical equipment; he saw the shiny, reflective metal of the walls, and his chest began to tighten with fright.
Suddenly, he heard what sounded like doors opening behind him. What the shit? his mind races as he turned around, terrified of what he'd encounter next.
Standing before him were two, muscular aliens, with saggy breast-shaped heads and long, slim bodies. They were a pale shade of green with large, bulbous black eyes; they did not look friendly. They stood there silently, not moving an inch.
Nicholas Zike had no clue how the hell he got himself into this mess, but he knew how he was going to get himself out: By brute force. In a moment of panic, Nick threw a haymaker at one of the aliens but missed terribly. His muscles abruptly tensed up, paralyzing him into a statue, allowing only his eyes to move. And what he saw next terrified him: All he could do was watch on in horror as one of the aliens caressed his face. By this point, Nick's pants were completely saturated in piss and he had was too exhausted to fight back.
"Do not fear us, human," the offending alien calmly stated. "My name's Ralph and we're apart of an intergalactic athletic association dedicated to discovering the finest athletic specimen to represent us on the universal level. We've been watching you playing basketball and were curious if you'd be interested in representing Planet Earth in the upcoming Universal Space Olympics."
Nick's jaw dropped so hard it nearly hit the floor. As a boy, he always dreamed of playing professional basketball, but not once had he considered representing planet earth in universal competition. That's a lot of responsibility.
Nick's knees began to buckle. He felt weak. He felt like he was going to collapse again.
"Relax, human. Here, have some of this really weird alien anxiety medication," Ralph said as he reached out to hand him a capsule. With no other options but to follow instructions, he did as he was told and suddenly felt a warmth overcome him. He came, and within moments found the peace he was searching for his entire life. And then, just like that, it disappeared.
"Okay, now that you've taken the tablet is as good a time as any to tell you that we lied. We actually just transplanted you with hacked DNA, which will promote the production of muscles whilst simultaneously increasing your load by 500%" Ralph informed him.
Nick stood there, shocked beyond reason.
"Now although this is illegal per the Intergalactic Rules & Regulations of 2050, our particular chemical remains undetectable. From now on, you will be allowed to perform," Ralph continued.
"'Allowed'? What do you mean 'allowed'?" Nick asked.
"Our organization prides itself on creating the most talented players in sports. Every superstar athlete you've ever seen on earth? All thanks to us. And why do we do it? Because we enjoy watching sports. And we also enjoy gambling. So by us transplanting you with illegally compromised DNA, we're increasing our likelihood of winning bets."
Nick understood. He shook his head with approval, as breaking the rules was nothing new to Nick, who was a renowned liar and cheater in his own respect.
"So what does all of this mean?" Nick asked the alien.
"All of this means that you're going to become a superstar basketball player one day. The world—and galaxy—will watch on with delight as you do your thing on the court. You'll distribute the ball with vision like never before; you'll put others above yourself, because that's what selfless beings do," Ralph replied with a smile. "And we'll profit..."
The next thing he knew, he was back in his own bed, sweating profusely. He looked around and was relieved to see familiar surroundings again. I must've been dreaming, he thought as he wiped the sweat from his forehead. But almost as soon as he could exhale with relief, a sudden boom rattled the house, shaking his bed. He leapt out of bed and ran downstairs, only to discover his mother preparing him breakfast.
"Did you hear that?" he asked her.
"Hear what?" she replied with confusion.
Pushing her aside, he raced toward the source of the sound: The backyard. When he got there, he found nothing; nothing had been disturbed. Confused, he scratched his head as he walked around. He looked up at the sky to see the same star that he saw the night before, hovering overhead. Before it could even process in his brain—in the blink of an eye—it disappeared.
What if... what if ... what if it actually happened..? he wondered...
Do I get points for this too?
